


As We Go Down, Slowly

by Jeanettesc



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, And Jaime Tries to be Better for Her, Angst, Both Pairings (especially after my struggle with S7), Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, First Time, Jealousy, Jon Keeps Being Stupid, No Cheating or Threesomes in this fic, Oral Sex, Smut, Voyeurism, underage at first
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2018-03-08
Packaged: 2018-08-22 00:44:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 7
Words: 21,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8266462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jeanettesc/pseuds/Jeanettesc
Summary: With a secret crush Sansa Stark can do nothing about, another forbidden path reveals itself. When it becomes known where her heart lies, Jaime is there, for what they both assume is purely physical. When she finally gets what she wants, Jon makes a decision that kills her faith in loyalty and love. Sansa is continuously torn and tested. Her feelings for Jon will never die, but Jaime realizes how better of a man he becomes with her in his life, so there IS a triangle. If that's not your game, then this fic isn't for you. After S7, I just want Sansa to be happy, and in this, she's merely trying to find it. I've re-edited every chapter since I orphaned this in November. S7 (and my anger with Jon) peaked my interest in it again, especially after Jaime's final scene, but there ARE (and will continue to be) Jonsa moments in this. Complete reboot! So you might want to read from the beginning, if you read this before.





	1. Bottom of the Bottle

**Author's Note:**

> First time writing this pair. Don't worry..storyline with Jon eventually rears its head, but I'll have fun with these two first.
> 
> Jamie's POV this chapter.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> JaimiexSansa Caution: (in the U.S) underage smut ahead, and ONLY this chapter.

 

 

 

  

  Jaime sat alone in his sister's living room, surrounded by the sound of chattering teenage girls. He hung his arms limply across the arms of his brother in law's recliner, and lifted his scotch to his lips, taking a long sip. 

 "Will you be secluded hereall _day,_ or will you eventuallygrace us with your presence?"Cersei's condescending tone came from behind him. 

He downed the rest of his glass and sighed. 

 "Your niece would likely appreciate you taking part in her birthday party."

 "For Christ sakeCersei, she's _seventeen years old.._ she could care _less_ about eitherof us today." He turned his head to meet her glare. "She's surrounded by her friends, and I have no desire tomingle with Robert or his friends." He reached for the bottle he snagged from Robert's stash, and poured freely until the glass was almost filled.

 "So, you'd rather sit in here and drink, while I'm left to entertainthese people _alone."_

 "You insisted on throwing this party here sister." He mumbled. 

  Cersai stepped closer and stroked his hair. " _Jaime..please._ I feel aloneout there. The Stark's, Tyrell's..Tristane's annoying family..they're allout there with their fake smiles, _attempting_ to be polite-"

 "I'm _perfectly_ content with where I _am._ I'll be here until you let me know when it's time for her cake and presents." He snapped.

  Her hand was out of his hair, but he _felt_ her eyes burning the back of his head. He took another gulp, and shook his head slowly. "If you had the decencyto invite our brother _,_ I'd at least have _someone_ to talk to."

  She scoffed behind him. "You can talk to _me."_

He chuckled. "And give those people another reason for shushed whispers and sneaky glares _?_ I think not _."_

She breathed heavily, and stomped off. 

  _Good riddance. I didn't even want to come to this damn thing. The honorable Stark's, and their perfect children. Robert and Ned, and their war stories. Catelyn Stark bragging about her sons and daughters. The pompous Tyrell's, with their money and charity work. Fuck them all._

 _"_ Mind if I _sit?"_

Jaime looked up. _Sansa Stark._ A friend of Myrcella's, and permanent fixture in the Baratheon house since before grade school. She had grown into quite the _beauty._ Standing tall, with wild red hair like _fire,_ she had managed to stand alone, even when surroundedby people. Jaime took notice of the Stark's eldest daughter once she went from a bratty, people pleasing, dreamer, to a bright, graceful, confident young woman.

  He did, however, question her interest in Joffrey. He didn't seem anywhere nearthe same league as Sansa. Joff was an _idiot._ He was cruel _._ It didn't make sensehow she'd find Joffrey appealingin any way. It didn't take her long at all to gain back his opinion of her intelligence, when she dumped Joffrey (pretty publicly, and embarrassingly) less than a month later.

  He waved his hand. _"_ By all _means."_

She plopped down on the couch, clapping her hands together between her knees, and looked around. 

 "Enjoying the _party?"_ He asked, taking a sip.

  She shrugged her shoulders. "It's _alright."_ She turned her head, her big blue eyes wandering over the room. 

 "Is my nephew being a gracious? _"_

 _"_ Not.. _really._ He's been bragging and showing off thatcrossbow Uncle Robert bought him for his birthday." She rolled her eyes. "Shunning me from group convo's and whispering loud enough for me to hear what a frigid bitch I am." She sighed as her eyes finaly rested on him. "And Cella's engrossed. Tristane, the Player-" Her eyes suddenly went wide. "Oh god..I'm rambling. Sorry _."_

Jaime smiled, amused at her realization. "It's _fine_ Sansa..I can relate _."_

She smiled, looking at his glass. "Got any _more_ of that?"

  Jaime raised an eyebrow. Instinctively, he looked behind him, and back to her. He leaned forward.

 "I..I don't think your parents would look too kindly on me giving their prized, seventeen year old, sweet daughter,alcohol."

  She leaned forward, squinted her eyes, and sneered. "Then you shouldn't _tell_ them _."_

Jaime swallowed. 

  _Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. This is so wrong._

He slowly reached for the bottle. An inner battle roared inside him, as he poured. He suddenly felt his blood race warm under the surface of his skin, when her eyes watched his every move with anticipation. She looked into his eyes, instead of the full glass he held. Licking her lips, her eyes darted over his shoulder quickly, and reached out her hand. 

  Jaime stalled for a moment. The thought of explaining how a minor got ahold of Robert's thirty year old scotch, crossing his mind.

  _Fuck it. With Joffrey for a son, he's bound for worse explanations..likely from authorities._

  He slowly and reluctantly handed her the glass. "You didn't get this from _me."_

She grinned and took the glass from him. Taking a long sip, she nearly finished it in two gulps, before straightening her head and making a sour face, she handed him back the glass. 

 "Got it, it's all on me if I get caught Jaime-I mean Mr. Lannister." She smacked her lips. 

 "Jaime is fineSansa." He sank back in the chair, refilling his glass. 

 "I better get back then." She stood, straightening her shorts. 

  Jaime took notice, eying how much of her thighs her shirts actually revealed. Slowly, he dare lets his eyes wander up. A peek of her bared waist caused him to snap his head down. He didn't need to be caught ogling her long torso, the under curve of her breasts, wisps of her fiery hair, cascading around them..

  He stuck to his guns, continuing to keep his sight right there on his lap, without squirming, as he heard her stepping closer. Leaning down, her hair grazed over the flesh of his arm, prickling every pore.  

 "Itll be our little secret.. _Jaime."_

Looking up just in time to see her grinning as she turned and walked away, he picked up the bottle and drank straight from it. 

 

"I don't _need_ a fucking ride, just call me a _cab."_ Jaime protested.

 "You're staying _._ Sansa and Margaery are the only one's staying the night, you can sleep in the guest house." Cersei insisted.

  Jaime teetered, gripping the counter to balance himself.

 "Are they _gone?"_ He slurred.

 "Who?"

 "The fucking _Stark's."_

"They just left _.._ and lower your _voice,_ there's still one here _."_ Cersei hissed. 

  Jaime saw Robert stumbling behind Cersei.

 "That's the last of them." He growled, looking up at Jaime. "Had one to manyLannister?"

 " _A few."_ Jaime mumbled under his breath.

 "He's sleeping out back." Cersei explained. 

  Robert's belly laugh turned his stomach. "Right. I'm _off_ then. Are you coming _?"_

 _"_ Momentarily dear _."_ She answered curtly.

  Robert grabbed food from out of the fridge and turned to leave the kitchen. 

  Cersei looked after him until they both heard his slow ascent over the stairs. She looked back at Jaime and slumped her shoulders. 

 "Would you like some help? _"_

He shook his head. "I'll be _fine."_

She tapped her nails on the counter, and sighed. "Would you like some _company?"_

 _"I'll be fine."_ He repeated.

  She stood still, looking exhausted and disappointed.  _"_ Fine then, see yourself out _."_

"Iwill. _"_

She left him there, while he stood in place, lingering long enough to listen as she made her rounds. She said goodnight to Myrcella and her friends first, then Joffrey, and finally Tommen. A twinge of guilt hit him as he tried to replay whether or not he'd pulled off being a good Uncle today. Overall, he assessed he had put in enough effort for it to be considered _sufficient._ Myrcella loved the gift he gave her, an elegant gold necklace, with a drop pendant of rubies encircling a Lion. Not something she could wear everyday, but it was their family's emblem, and he wanted to give her something more Lannister than Baratheon.

  Joffrey was a miserable shit. Acting openly jealous of the Stark boys. Robb, and his chiseled jaw and Jon and his pretty face and under-the-surface knowledge, his endearing need to belongto the family that took him in. Even their teenage brothers were close. Closer than _this lot._

When he watched the lights go out, and heard the last door shut, he made his way out the back door. Walking down the steps, past the pool, the hot tub, the ridiculous fish pond, he finally made it to the front door of the guest house. Stumbling inside, he searched the kitchen first for any alcohol, and found beer in the fridge. Popping the cap, he took a swig as he walked into the master bedroom. He stood in front of the king size bed, and set the bottle on the nightstand, before stripping down.

_Who gives a fuck. I want to be naked._

He fell into bed, not bothering to get under the covers, and thought to rub one out before he sank into a drunken abyss.

_And I have the perfect person in mind.._

He was hard already. He had been hard since her hair swept his skin and he inhaled the scent of it.

  _Sansa. God..if only you were of age. If this was your hand. No. Your mouth. Your mouth around my hard cock. Those soft pink lips, your tongue moving up and down..licking my head..moaning around it..your long skinny fingers grazing my balls..your wet cunt. Fuck. Your cunt has to be tight. Tight. Wet. Under me. Sinking easily into her. So tight it's painful. Squeezing me all the way down..and back up. Her body. The things I'd do to that body! That mouth. Those lips. Her cunt. Fuck._

He shuddered, warm semen pulsing onto his stomach, her name choking from his dry throat, as his body jerked over and over in a painful sweet release. Heavy in breath, his eyes still shut as the vision of her thighs popped in his head. He should have felt shame. He _didn't._ Sansa was on his brain and he stillwanted what he'd just fantasized about. He plucked two tissues from the nightstand and wiped the sticky cum from his stomach. Throwing them onto the nightstand, he reached up to pull the lamp chain, took a deep breath, and lay back, finally drifting into a drunken slumber.

  

  He stirred awake, and lifted his head. A pounding beat relentlessly as he smacked the roof of his mouth. He needed water. His hand reached for the lamp to turn it on, but knocked it over. 

 " _Fuck."_ He cursed.

  He _froze._ Someone was in the room.

_Cersei._

  He knew better than to call out her name, so he lay his head back on the pillow, waiting for the inevitable. He heard faint footsteps. His eyes hadn't adjusted to the limited light in the room yet, and his eyes stayed shut as he waited for the pounding in his head to ease.It was taking so long, he was about to prop himself up, when he felt the light touch of her knee against his hand, that hung over the edge of the bed. 

 "I told you I was fine _."_ He groaned. "I just need some water."

  _Nothing. Just faint breathing._

Her knee bumped his hand once again. He hesitated, then felt the blood rushing to his groin. He moved his hand onto her skin, feeling her soft thigh. His palm flat, he moved it up slowly, between her opened legs, until he felt her bare, exposed lips. She was soft, wet, swollen and warm. The blood rushed straight to his cock, as he slid two fingers right into her soaking wet cunt. A high pitch whimper of pleasure filled his ears as he started moving deeper..

  _Wait._

_No._

_This isn't her._

_No._

His fingers stilled inside her. His breath caught in his throat, constricted, with his heart pounding in his chest. His two fingers were inside someone that _wasn't Cersei..and that's where they stayed._

 Her hips moved, without sound.

 " _Jaime..don't stop."_ She asked, already heavy in breath.

He nearly ceased to exist at her voice.

  _Sansa._

_Oh fuck._

_No._

_This is so wrong._

_I can't do this._

_Why are my fingers still inside her._

_Oh Jesus fuck, they are already inside her._

His fingers twitched as his mind screamed at him to take them out and demand she leave.

  _Stop this Jaime!_

She moved her hips around slowly and squeezed her thighs around his hand, trapping him. 

  _So fucking wet and sweet. I can smell her now. I smell her cunt. I want to taste it. Oh god..stop. Stop this._

Every second moved painfully slow, and his movements betrayed him as he started exploring more of her warmth. She writhed around his touch, encouraging him. He started pumping his fingers now, squeezing his eyes shut and going back to imagine it was his sister. Fingering her warm..wet..tight cunt. The Stark's daughter.

_My fingers are inside Sansa Stark._

Gliding his thumb easily through her slit, he kept it flat, stroking across her swollen nub when an unmistakeable moan squeaked from her throat. It was the sweetest fucking moan he had ever heardand filled him with the intense urge to make her come like she never has before. He didn't want her to ever forget it. 

  His fingers pumped soft and deep as he listened to the slick sounds her cunt made. His cock throbbed the wetter she became and couldnt help pulling them out quickly. Greedily licking every drop of her off his fingers, shepanted and sunk her nails in his shoulder. She was silently begging him and cried out when he sucked from his fingertips, to glide them back into her hole. He fucked her with his fingers like he'd fuck her with his cock, lifting his own hips, lost in the thought. 

 " _Have you come before?"_ He rasped. 

She breathed fast and heavy. "N-not with ahh-anyone. _"_

_I'll be the first man to get her off. I'm about to make Ned Stark's daughter come around my fingers._

_"Oh god."_ She panted.

  Her hips were thrusting forward, when he curled his fingers inside, rubbing her clit with his thumb. He suddenly decided to replace his thumb with his tongue. Leaning into her perfumed cunt, he lapped her clit with his tongue so hard, she bucked her hips, sobbing out loudly, while she thrashed forward, and fisted his hair.

 "Fuck Jaime..oh..oh _god._ _"_

He wasn't done with her yet, trying to lick up as much of her as he could, while her walls continued to pulse around his fingers. Her breath still shook before coming in a slower rhythm, he felt the grip through his hair soften. 

 " _Fuck."_ She breathed. "Thank you." She stumbled back quickly.

 "Wait- _."_ He called out.

  She was already gone, and with that, the guilt began to shadow the red hot pleasure. Covering his face with the hand that  still smelled of her, he groaned to remind himself this was not a dream. If he managed to get any sleep at all, his nightmare starring Sansa Stark, had just begun.

 

  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I re-edited this first chapter as I plan on doing to the rest before updating.


	2. A Graduation and Tour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jon makes an appearance. And Jaime interrupts the "moment" and has one of his own.

 

 

 

  _Graduation night. It's done._

Sansa glanced once more at Margaery before they broke off with their families. Marg winked and grinned crookedly before Sansa nodded and smiled back. She got in the backseat and was driven home with her family for her graduation party. 

  Two boring hours later, she sat alone with a cup of virgin punch in front of her. She observed the adults in their groups, talking and drinking. Robb was in his group. Her parents were in their group. Myrcella with Tristane and her mother. The younger ones ran in and out. And Jon..

  _I can't even look at him right now._

She snatched her phone, and texted Margaery.

  **_Are you as bored as I am?_**

**_Yep. Can't wait to get out of here. Loras dropped off the cooler and kegs out there for us already._ **

**_Good. Can't wait. See you when it's all done._ **

**_See you there._ **

"You celebrating alone _?"_

She didn't need to look up to know it was him, and his silky voice, asking her the obvious. She put her phone down on it's face and looked up at Jon, already pulling out the chair next to her. She looked around for Ygritte. Unable to spot her, she pursed her lips and folded her arms over her chest.

 "Why are you so pouty..it's your Graduation party." 

  She rolled her eyes. "It's more for _them_ than _me."_ She said, her eyes darting in the direction of her parents.

 "Yes..I suppose the realparty starts _later."_

Sansa's eyes widened at his words. He grinned back at her and looked down, shaking his head.

 "You think you and Marg are the first onesto throw an after-party at the Lake Sansa _?"_

She was unwilling to talk about it with him. They don't havethese kind of conversations _._ They're _cousins._ He grew up in the Stark house, and looked upon everyone as his own family. Her brothers,  _his brothers,_ her sister,  _his sister,_ her parents,  _his parents._ She grew up with him that way, and it wasn't suppose to change. Nothing about how she felt, was suppose to ever change. 

 _"_ Shouldn't you be getting back to your _date?"_ She refused to mention her by name.

Jon's brow crinkled in confusion. His eyes showing a hint of hurt, Sansa swallowed hard, feeling guilt twist inside her stomach. 

 "Are you pissed that I _invited her?"_

 _"Jon."_ She started.

 "Save it _,_ you've been nasty about her from the _start."_ He sighed in frustration and leaned forward over the table. "Just be honest, why don't you like her _?"_

_You don't want to know._

_You just brought her in here and from day one it's been her..holding your hand..whispering in your ear..laughing that ridiculous laugh at your stupid jokes..it makes me sick. I'm SICK about it. I really wish you'd break up with her._

Sansa sat quietly, while her thoughts conflicted with the right way to answer him. 

 "Are you _jealous?"_

_There it was._

_"Yes."_

She stared straight into his stunned eyes. 

  _You asked._

She held her determined chin high, and watched his lips part to speak.

 "Congratulations Sansa." Jaime Lannister's voice came from behind her.

  They both whirled around to look at Jaime casuallystanding there. 

 "Thank you Mr. Lannister." Sansa said. She stood up, shivering as he took her hand into his. 

  _God, he's so warm. Those fingers.._

"I told you, _Jaime._ I insist _."_

He lifted her hand and delicately kissed her knuckles, his eyes still on hers. 

 "Excuse us _Jaime._ We were in the middleof something." Jon said, on his feet next to them. 

  Jaime dropped her hand. "My apologies _."_ He turned to Jon and extended his hand. "Jon, right? _"_

Jon hesitated before taking it. Sansa watched both their forearm muscles tense while they shook hands curtly.

 " _Right."_ Jon stiffened. He looked at Jaime for a moment, then back at Sansa. "Shall we _?"_

 _"_ No." She sighed. "Jaime have you been given the tour _"_ She asked in her gracious hostess voice. 

 "Not yet _."_ He grinned, lifting a brow.

 "Sansa _."_ Jon warned.

 "We're done talking about that Jon, I'm going to show Jaime the house _."_

  She looped her arm in Jaime's and turned to walk away. She felt his eyes burning the back of her head. Looking over her shoulder, she saw exactly what she'd expected, and although she didn't need to, she said it anyway.

 "And here comes your _date."_ She managed to flash Ygritte a fake smile as she passed.

 

 "Can I fix you a _drink?"_ She asked him, opening her parent's liquor cabinet. 

  She had walked him through the house, and wound up in her father's study, where they were finally alone.The voices and laughter carried from outside the window, but on the second floor with a wooden staircase leading up, she'd have a few seconds notice should she end up in a compromising position with the man with the golden fingers. 

 "Sorry, I don't think Dad has anything _aged_ as much as you like _."_ She said smiling into the cabinet. 

 "Yes he does." Jaime growled from close behind her. His hands snaked around her hips as he pressed his crotch against her bottom.

  Sansa gasped softly, gripping the handles of the cabinet, her head falling back against his chest. She could think of nothing to say at this point, only wanting him to touch her. His body pressed forward while his hands burned her skin. At any moment, someone could walk up, yet she didn't fight the urge to grind back against him. Feeling the length of him, rock hard, between the cleft of her ass, she rutted up as a throaty moan rumbled from her throat.

 Jamie's fingers made their way, once again, between her thighs. She felt his erection shift behind her, as he dipped down slightly, to move his hand up.. _up..oh gods.._ between her thighs from behind, she felt the tips of his fingers slipping under the edge of her soaked panties. She went so hotdown there, she inhaled deeply and raised an arm over her head, hooking it around the back of his neck. He leaned into the crook of her neck as his knuckles held back the fabric, and slid two fingers easily inside. She whimpered and bit her lip to keep as quiet as she could, while His breath came out hot against her neck.

 "God damn Sansa, you're  _wet. Really wet."_ He rasped. "Is this for me? _"_ He started moving his fingers across the fabric. "Or _him."_

Sansa's eyes snapped open. "Wha-..wh- _who?"_ She stammered.

 "I'm no foolSansa. _"_ He swept her underwear further to the side to sink even deeper. 

 " _Fuuuck."_ She moaned, forgetting his question.

 "Jon..does he know?" He slowly pulled both fingers out and slid them up and down her clit.

  She winced quietly, and shook her head.

  He sighed, while softly grinding his cock against her ass and mumbled something like 'fool' into her skin before taking a small bite in a sensitive spot on her neck.

 "Young _love."_

 _"Jaime."_ She pleaded. She felt her climax building. Her body as hot as she's ever felt it, aching and dying to feel what only he has made her feel. Getting fingered from behind was absolutely new, and so was feeling a man, not a boy, a _man,_ pressing his body so close to hers, he'd need protection if it weren't for clothes.

 _"_ I've been dreamingof being inside this sweet pussy for months Sansa _._ Getting you _off.._ hearing you moan, I can't get it out of my head..I just wanted _more_ _."_

She was moving her hips back, writhing around his fingers, and impulsively reached behind. With urgency, she fumbled his zipper open and managed her hand through until she felt it.

  _Holy shit._

It was the first time she had felt one in the flesh. The others were always over clothes and spilled before she had the chance to do any real work. They also weren't as endowed as Jaime. Each finger wrapped around his length and with a firm grip, she beganpumping her hand up and down while his moans assured her she was doing it right. 

 _"_ What do you _want_ Jaime?" She whined. 

  His fingers worked a faster pace, their heavy breathing becoming louder as they both got _closer._

 _"I want to fuck you. I want to be the first to be inside your wet, tight pussy."_ He groaned when Sansa tightened her grip, and stroked faster. " _I want to fuck that boy right out of your HEAD."_

 _"Oh god Jaime."_ Her eyes rolled back. 

  She squeezed her thighs around his hand, feeling the verge of climax rushing through her. Her head pushed back into his chest so hard, he teetered back. He pulled her back by her hip, and slid his fingers deep inside her. She convulsed forward when she came, her grip tightening around his cock until she moved back again, and heard him grunt loudly into her dampened neck. Their bodies remained close, until Jaime's pulses stilled in her hand. She felt his cum on her fingers and shuddered. 

  _So that's what it feels like. Jesus that was hot..getting him off. Jaime fucking Lannister._

 _"_ I..there's..it's on your clothes Sansa, I'm so sorry _."_

She turned around, her face an inch from his. "Don't be. _"_ She smiled, and as natural as it seemed, she didn't lean forward to kiss him.

 "I'm going to get cleaned up." She started to move away. 

  He adjusted himself back in his pants, and grasped her arm before she could take another step. 

 "I want to see you again." His eyes were serious.

  Sansa felt tingles rush through her body. "Everyone's numbers are written on the fridge..save mine _."_ She bit her lip and turned to walk out. "Thanks again Jaime."

 

  She expected the after party to be fun, but it turned out to be a drunken fuck-fest. Margaery stuck with her for the first hour, then abandoned her to do god knows what..or _who._ Myrcella, who drove her, disappeared with Tristane immediately _,_ and she was left with some pretty sorry prospects. She sipped her beer, and made small talk with random acquaintances, who were equally ready to hook up. She excused herself from about five group conversations and walked to the keg to refill her cup, when she stopped cold.

  _Jon._

Standing there, by the keg. His hands were shoved in the pockets of his tight jeans, wearing his infamous thrift shop hoodie, his hair tied back, and looking aimlessly around the sea of faces. 

  _Fuck!_

Before she could turn to walk the other way, he spotted her. She gulped, and decided to dodge him anyway. Moving quickly though the dying crowd, she made her way through the light of their campfire, and towards the trees by the lake. She didn't look back. She wasn't running, rather walking  _fast._ She heard no footsteps behind her, and kept moving through the trees until she emerged onto the lake shore.

  And there he stood. Not out of breath, hands still in his pockets, a ' _you should know better'_ look on his face. 

 "What are you doing here? _"_ She asked coldly.

He withdrew his hands from his pockets and took a step forward. 

 "We never finished talking _."_ He answered quietly.

  Sansa smiled sarcastically. "Jesus Christ Jon. You _crashed_ my grad party..in the _woods,_ at 2 a.m. to finish our discussion _?"_

He took another step toward her. "Yes _."_

_Another step._

Her breath caught in her throat. 

  _Another step._

 _"_ I would have finished it _earlier.."_

_Another step._

He's so close, she can feel his breath, and holds hers. 

 _".._ but you and.. _Jaime._ _"_

_Oh my god NO._

Jon's eyes dropped and he sighed heavily. "Why Sansa? Why would you let him do- _TOUCH you like that?"_ He lifted his head to look back at her. 

  She could see he was raging and could barely keep her gaze. She swallowed hard, unable to think of an answer, an explanation..

 _".._ when you want _me."_

He finished his sentence and her mouth fell open as she realized.

  _He heard. He heard and saw everything._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay for cliffhangers. The Jonsa might burn a little slower, but that's why they're tagged 2nd. I want Jaime to have a little fun with her first. Comments and kudos are appreciated! Thanks for reading guys!


	3. Two Losses and Multiple Gains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> OhhhhhKay..this picks up where it left off, and um..the second half is Jaime and Sansa. That's all I'm sayin.

 

 

 

 "You watchedus?" 

  Jon took another step closer. "I came to find you. I searched through the house to ask whyyou'd _possibly_ be jealousof my girlfriend, when I round the corner and see Jaime fucking Lannister with...with.." He growled out in disgust, and grasped her roughly by her shoulders. 

  Sansa felt just about everything a person in this situation could feel. _Shock, fear, embarrassment, shame, anger..extreme anger, and.._ warm.

 _"_ With his fingers inside me?" She finished defiantly.

  His face, contorted with anger and lust, stayed straight, as did his eyes, glowering into hers. 

 "Yes. _"_ His breath came out hot, close to her face. " _Sansa.."_ Her name cracked in his throat. "Why didn't you just _tell me?"_

She narrowed her eyes. "What difference would it have made? _"_ She leaned forward. "Would you have dumped her for your cousin, and have it be your fingers instead? _Your_ cock in my grasp instead of his?"

The smallest hint of a whimper escaped his lips, nearly brushing against her lips.

 " _Yes."_ He breathed. 

  She wanted so badly to kiss him now that he knew how she felt. "You've realized these feelings for me have you? After my jealousy reared its head, you saw me with him and suddenly you want me." She snapped forward with her body and heard him groan. "Did you go down and break up with her?" She asked hesitantly and held her breath. 

He stiffened, his chest heaved in deep breath and she pulled away quickly.

 "Sansa.. _wait."_ He pleaded.

  She stomped away, she couldn't get away from him fast enough. Right on her heels, he soon grabbed her arm and whipped her around. Her fury burned so hot, her whole face was on fire. 

 "Go back to her Jon _."_ She hissed. 

 " _Why?_ So you can go back to _him?"_

She struggled and squirmed in his hand, he just tightened his grip. 

 "Let me go, you're hurting me!"

He released her like she was burning his skin. 

 "I'm sorry. Sansa I didn't-" He looked down in shame.

  Her phone buzzed in her pocket. She pulled it out to look at an unknown number, and shivered when she read the text. 

  **_You still out?_**

"Is that him?" Jon asked looking down.

 "That's none of your business _."_ She spat.

  He took a step closer. "He's old enoughto be your _father."_

Her eyes bore into his. "At least he's free _.._ and we're not..related _."_

She turned to leave, holding her phone in her hand, she walked away from him with tears rolling down her cheeks. She heard the rustling of leaves and quickened footsteps behind her, turning, before he could reach for her again. 

 "Jon, I-"

  His mouth was on hers before she spoke another word. His lips we're soft and full over hers. She was spinning, her body exploding, her feet left the ground completely. As she felt the swipe of his tongue across her lips, she opened them in kind and sighed when she tasted him. She played with it hungrily, her hands threading through the thick curls of his hair, the way she's fantasized about for _years,_ pulling him further into her mouth (if that was possible) wanting more.

  He tasted better than she imagined he ever would. His tongue working perfectly, she hoped she wasn't using too eager with hers, swirling it lazily inside his warm mouth. He crushed her doubt, when a low, throaty growl vibrated from him, sending fiery tingles racing through her.

  His arms held her _close. So close._ She felt _everything._ His rapid heartbeat, his every tightened muscle, his lungs taking every sharp breath, his silky black hair through every finger, his beard hair around her lips and chin, his _arousal._

_The man knew how to kiss. I'm lost. Lost._

She jerked back, and braced her hands across his chest. Unable to meet his eyes, she leaned close to him, still panting, when kissed the top of her head and cupped her cheek. 

 _"_ I don't _care_ if we're related Sansa..I do have feelingsfor you _."_

She sighed heavily, and closed her eyes. She _ached_ for him. 

 _"_ Not _enough_ Jon." She winced when she pulled away from his body, head hung low, she walked away from him, her heart cracking with each painful, slow step away. 

She looked down at her phone through blurry eyes and texted back. 

_**Yes. Come get me.**_

_**Where are you**_

_**I'll be at the Lake turn off.**_

_**Be right there**_

She walked through the woods, rather than face anyone at the party. She wanted out of here as soon as possible. She walked until she saw headlights from the highway. It was too soon for it to be Jaime. She watched through the tree line and her heart sank as she recognized Jon's truck speeding by. Her first instinct was to flag him down. 

_Come back Jon._

His tail lights glowed red until he rounded the curve a mile down the road, and she was left with emptiness _._ She already knew she loved him, had known for quite a while.

  She remembered the first time she saw him differently _._ Robb had his friends over for a pool party after he graduated. Sansa invited her own friends _,_ which pissed him off because they were all underage. Jon emerged from the house, pale and out of his element, awkwardly mingling with Robb's friends. He finally dove into the pool, and swam next to her. He folded his arms over the edge, and kicked his legs right next to her. They talked..and talked, more than they had ever talked before.

  He was funny, well..his sarcasm was funny. He finally opened up about the difference between home-Robb and social-Robb. She laughed more with him than she ever had with anyone that afternoon, choosing his company while letting her friends have at it with Robb and his group. She opened up to him. They learnedthings about each other, and she came to feel as though she was finally getting an insight to the stranger that lived in their house. 

  By sundown, she nearly held his hand when they were out of the pool. She realized, and was quite taken aback, when she began flirting with him. Her insides churned, thinking of how wrongit was, especially when he acted oblivious, so she excused herself from the group, avoided him for the rest of the night, and let her restless, internal, _moral_  struggle keep her up all night.

  And _here they were._

  Two years later. Her feelings for him never _waning._ Never put on a _back burner._ Just the _opposite._ Everyone else since, was a distant second, a filler, not even interesting enough to be a pleasant distraction. Oh, how she _tried_ to fill her unrequited heart, and the disappointment piled up. Joffrey, _no._ Loras, _no._ Harry, _yawn._ No one stepped it up..that is..until she spotted Sir Jaime at Cella's party. He was such a man, a manly-man.He was kind, not cruel, he liked females, was anything but a bore, he didn't brood in a corner, and most importantly, wasn't tied to anyone.

As if on cue, she spotted headlights and heard the purring engine before she saw the car. Sansa could care _less_ about cars, but her brow arched in interest when she saw his. The engine purred, it looked shiny and sleek and damn, he looked delicious driving it. She walked forward when he pulled in front of her, leaning over to open the door. She got in and shut the door a little too hard.

 "You alright? _"_

She sat still, staring straight ahead, tears threatening to well up. She suddenly leaned over to kiss him, needing to feel his lips on hers. He kissed her back, wasting no time as his hands combed through her hair, and pulling her in to deepen it. She sloppily devoured his lips until she couldn't breath any harder, he tugged her hair strongly to expose her neck and licked a long stripe up by her ear and bit down. 

 " _Jesus."_ She moaned. "Take me away from here. _"_

 _"_ Where shall I take you _?"_ He asked. 

 "Your place? _"_

 

He walked behind her as she entered his home. It was a bachelor's house for sure. Nothing very home-y about it. 

 "You want a drink?" He asked walking into the kitchen.

 _"_ Um not _.._ maybe just some water? _"_

He arched his brow and opened his fridge. Handing her a bottle of water, he grinned widely. 

 "Had enough to drink already _?"_

She twisted the cap open, and drank half the bottle down. Her lips popped off the plastic, and she wiped her mouth.

 "No..I've just had _enough."_ She licked her lips looking at him across the counter. 

  He walked around slowly, until he came to stand closely over her, as she held her breath the entire time. Her mind was racing, still unsure about..everything. He swept his knuckle under her chin, to lift her head. She met his eyes and stared intently as he left no doubt. Everything in his stare told her how much he wanted her. It made her tingle everywhere, excited her, made the top of her lip sweat. 

  _God..it's hot. Why is it so hot in here?_

When he leaned down to kiss her, she brought her arms up and locked them around his neck. She needed this, needed to feel this, needed the way Jaime lifted and carried her away from everything. She welcomed the escape, and would let him sweep her away. Closing the distance between their bodies, her leg curved around his as she moaned an approval.

He reached below the hem of her dress, and pulled it swiftly over her arms and head. She stood before him, watching as his mouth fell open in breath and followed his hands as they reached to pull her panties down to her ankles. Stepping out of them, she looked back up as he scanned her naked body. She kept her gaze and breathed shallow. 

 "You..you are _absolutely perfect."_

She sighed, relieved to hear it _,_ loving the way he looked at her.

 _"_ Jaime, will you. _.."_ Her throat suddenly constricted. She couldn't speak another word. 

  He closed in on her, cupping both breasts, he dipped his head down to take a nipple in his mouth and kissed it gently. 

 "Will I.. _what?_ What do you want me to do Sansa?"

 "What..what you said..earlier?" 

She squeaked when he suddenly lifted her up and sat her on the counter. Parting her legs, he hoisted them over his shoulder before she felt his tongue licking straight up her clit. He sucked at the sensitive flesh softly and teased it between his tongue and teeth before lapping back down to push it through her lips. 

  _Holy FUCK. WOW._

She moaned, dragging her heals across his back as he breathed heavy through his nostrils and scratched her ass with his scruffy chin. 

 "I said a lot of things earlier _."_ He whispered against her pink flesh. " _To which are you referring?"_

 _"_ Jaime.. _please."_ She rolled her hips. 

  He licked down further, flicking over her ass with his tongue and making her jump, she squirmed in ecstasy as he thrust it back into her cunt. As she felt her blood rushing between her legs, it began to throb in ache and she felt free to moan as loud as she wanted. She trembled as his mouth pulled off her.

 "You saw him tonight didn't you _?_ He came out there _?"_

 _"Yes."_ She choked.

 "And you want me to.. _fuck him out of your head?"_

She closed her eyes. " _Yes."_ She admitted.

He plunged back in her, licking her up and down until her bare ass squirmed its way to the edge. He growled in frustration, grabbed her waist and slid her off the counter. Her legs wrapped around him, tasting herself on his tongue as she kissed him deeply. 

  He undid his pants with his free hand, stepped out of them, and turned to walk her upstairs. She clung to him tightly, clawed at his shirt, ripping seams as she yanked it over his head. Feeling a naked man's body against hers was _new._ His hard cock resting between her legs was _new._ Everything about what was happening right now..was _new._ He got to the bottom of the stairs, when she felt the head of his cock placed right at her entrance. 

  She was so wet, so ready, wanting nothing more than all of him inside her. Unable to wait any longer, and to avoid his trepidation about her being a virgin, she sank down his length with one quick push, and impaled herself on his cock.

 " _Fuck!"_ He swore. 

  She bit her lip from the pain, bit down so hard, she tasted blood. He filled her, the feeling, more a sore _ache_ than sharp pain,  she whined for him to move. He dropped to his knees on the second or third step, bracing her tight as he slowly lay over her. He remained inside of her, and looked into her teary eyes. 

 " _Sansa."_ He groaned. "I was going to do this _gently.._ I didn't know you were- _"_

 _"_ I don't want gentle right now..I want you to fuck me hard.

Jaime grunted like an animal at her words. He started to move inside her. Slow..and _deep._ She appreciated his concern, but they hadn't even made it to the _bed._ She wanted to be _fucked,_ not made love to.She _wanted_ the pain. 

 " _Fuck Sansa."_

  Her body reacted at his deep grunts in her ear. " _Harder Jaime..oh god!"_

He started pounding into her, the dull ache gone as her body writhed in pleasure _._ She was getting more wet with each thrust, heard it as his cock slid out of her and plunged back in. The way the base of his cock kept sliding over her clit, caused her ache to build as she arched her back to the lower step to get more. He held her back tightly, his head digging further into her shoulders, grunting loudly and biting down on her skin. She sunk her nails into his back, when the pressure had built to a breaking point, she bit down on his shoulder. 

 " _Fuck Sansa..I'm going to cum."_ He warned.

 "Me too,  _just don't stop!"_

Her toes curled into the balls of her feet, when she felt a hot ache pulsing through her. Her body was trembling, and she couldn't control it..she couldn't control _anything._ The orgasm erupted through her, blinded by it, she screamed out.

 " _Yes! Oh god ahhh yes!"_

Sansa's body shuddered beneath him as he stilled inside her with his final thrust. He grunted out breathlessly and continued to slowly move inside her. His body spasms over her and continued to shiver at the end, before he gently lay his cheek on her shoulder. 

 "I..I want to do that _again."_ She said, still panting. 

  Jaime chuckled. "It doesn't work that way..for _either_ of us. _"_ He swept a sweaty strand of hair from her forehead. "You have to give you're body a few minutes." He breathed. 

 "Like..5 minutes?" 

  His laughter echoed through the hall. "In _my case.._ more like 10 or 15..but I'm flattered Sansa. _"_

She rolled over and realized how uncomfortable she was. The stairs were no place to cuddle _._

 _"_ Take me to bed please _..and stay awake for 10 more minutes."_ She teased.

He scooped up her limp body, and carried her up the stairs. Looking up at him, she raised her hand to play with his pretty, thick blonde hair, with her other arm draped around his strong, broad back, she admired how _truly_ attractive a man he _was._

 _"_ What are you staring at beautiful _?"_ He asked with a grin.

She smiled and said the first thing that crossed her mind. "My knight in shining armor." 

  He lay her gently down on his bed, and crawled on top of her. Her eyes widened in surprise when she felt him between her legs again.

 "I guess I don't have to wait another 8 minutes." She smirked.

  He pushed into her, slowly this time. "No Sansa, you _don't."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eek..did I..give Jaime and Sansa a little..fluff? I didn't mean it..maybe it's because it was the poor girls first time? Anyways..let me know. Thanks for reading y'all!


	4. When it All Comes Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is ALL JONSA. The entire chapter is Jon's POV.

 

 

 

  Instead of merging into the left lane to make his way home, he kept driving straight. He knew Ygritte would be asleep in his bed, and he knew he was no longer capable of lying next to her, without thinking of Sansa. That's all it took. One confession. _One kiss..._ and the world as he knew it, would never be the same. His stomach stirred relentlessly throughout the course of the entire evening. An overwhelming mirageof thoughts consumed him. His head was _buzzing._ He wished desperately for the calm order of his life before today.

  _But..then I wouldn't know the way she feels about me. Why am I so ready to leave the life as I've known it behind? It's like I waited for a moment like this to happen, coasting through, waiting for this huge complication to come along, and not only do I not hesitate at the thought of leaving someone I had genuine feelings for, but could care less about the shit tons of baggage that comes with it? Ned and Cat? My cousins? She's my cousin! Jaime Lannister?_

Jon slammed his foot down on the gas, speeding down the dark country road, visions of that asshole's hands on her, flashing through his head. _Pleasing_ her. Asking her about _him,_ in his careless, smooth voice. The knots that formed in his stomach, from not only watching, but _listening_ to Jaime figure out what he was too stupid to see, twisted violently inside him, especially  when Sansa returned the affection. He could have easily barged in, and cold cocked the fucking pervert in the jaw, but he froze where he stood. 

  _Sansa was jealous because she wants me. How could I KNOW? She's never said anything, and he wants to make her forget about me? Fuck me out of her head?_

He was torn between causing a very _public_ scene, reeling at the revelation of Sansa being in love with him, and watching an _intended private encounter_ between two consenting adults. He walked away, trying to shake out her erotic moans of pleasure pounding in his ears..pleasure at the hands of another man..jealousy raging within, that it was not by  _his._

He should have gone outside immediately and talked to Ygritte. He should have explained that his heart was no longer in it, that  _everything_ was different now. Instead, he went outside, grabbed a drink, and stewed silently in the corner while everyone around him made him feel more miserable. Ygritte asked what troubled him, and he lied about a headache, and suggested going home. She offered to come back with him, he could barely look at her when he reluctantly agreed. He was an _ass._ Even after seeing her with Jaime, the idea of being with Sansa, had firmly latched onto his heart and refused to let go.

  _It's ME she wants. She's only using him, same as I would if I took Ygritte home right now and fucked her. Maybe I should._

He drove home, clenching his jaw, without speaking a word. She wanted to fool around with him when they walked in the house. He told her he still had a headache and just wanted to sleep. Instead of leaving at his sudden disinterest, she crawled into his bed and fell asleep with her back turned against him. He lay there for _hours,_ blinking, and staring at his ceiling in the dark. Sleep would not come, just more visions and thoughts of _Sansa._ After lying still for more than four hours, he felt as though he might lose his mind. He looked at the clock, checked his phone, and decided he _needed to talk to her._

He knew where the party was. Knew she'd still be out. He slowly rolled out of bed, looking down on Ygritte as he kneeled down to blindly grab a pair of pants and what feltlike his hoodie, and tiptoed out of the room. He quickly dressed in the living room and slipped in a pair of boots by the door. Moving like a theif in the night, he snuck out his front door and got in his truck. He took a deep breath, considered what he was about to do one last time, and winced as he turned the key, dreading the roar of his engine putting to life. 

  _Too late now. All or nothing._

Parking on the outskirts of the trees, he walked toward the shore and found her easily enough. Confronting her was numbing. Chasing after her was heart racing. Kissing her was.. _life changing._

He'd made the wrong decision. If he would have just followed his instincts, he could've answered _YES.._ and he'd probably still be in her arms, kissing her until dawn. Alas, he didntbreak up with Ygritte and she walked away from him, and likely in the arms of a much older man.

  He screeched the brakes as he neared the turn into the Stark's driveway. Turning too fast, he lost control for a split second, then eased his brakes, straightened his wheel, and glided to a horizontal stop in the middle of the road. His heart beat quickly, pulsing through his temples, he gripped the wheel and slowly drove his truck down the path of trees. Parking next to Robb's car, he got out and lifted the plant the spare key was hidden under. Silently making his way down to the basement, he took one of Ned's beers from his small fridge and stood by the ground window, waiting for headlights.

  _Come home Sansa. Please. Come home._

Setting his beer on the window ledge, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and went into his messages. _Nothing._ He clicked on Ygritte's, and typed.

  **_We need to talk. Come by the Stark's when you wake up._**

 

He stirred in the chair, hearing gravel from the front. He stood quickly and looked out the window. 

  _Ygritte._

The clock on the wall read 7:25. Was Sansa dropped off while he slept? In a _chair?_ The sun was bright in the sky, and Jon wondered if anyone was awake yet. He owed Ygritte at _least, a private audience, while he broke up with her..first thing in the morning, after disappearing in the dead of night, to talk to his cousin, who he was in love with. God I'm an asshole..Perhaps even more than Jaime fucking Lannister._

He raced up the steps, and lunged at the door before she had a chance to knock. Using every muscle in his hand to turn the knob as silently as he could, he eased the door open enough to squeeze through it. He closed it softly and turned around, facing Ygritte. 

 "What's going _on?_ Why did you leave me and stay  _here?"_

Jon walked closer to her when she must have read his obvious, grim expression. 

  She backed away from him. "You had me _drive here to break up with me? You bastard!"_

 _"_ Ygritte, _please.."_

 _"No!_ If you didn't want a _scene,_ you should have had the _decency_ to come _home!"_ Her face contorted in anger. "Who is _it?_ Someone at the party?"

 _"_ No _._ It's complic-..yes.. _.maybe."_ He stuttered like an idiot.

She scoffed. "Maybe?! You're dumping me for a _maybe?_ You said you loved me Jon! A _maybe_ walks in and takes everything we've built in the last year?"

 "She's taken _nothing_ Ygritte. It's..I _feel.._ _sorry."_

 _"_ You're an _idiot. You know nothing Jon."_ She walked away more pissed than hurt.

  He watched as she screeched away, speeding down the path, and heard the door open behind him. 

 "What the _hell_ Jon?"

 "Morning Robb." He said without turning. 

 "Did you stay here? What's happening? Who _was_ that, _Ygritte?_

 _"_ Yeah." He sighed. "I just broke up with her."

  Robb now stood next to him and looked down at the tire trenches in the gravel. He patted him across the back.

 "Well, I don't think she took it too well Jon. _"_  

  Jon finally looked at Robb, who was widely grinning. " _No_ Robb, she didn't take it very well." 

 "It's _early_ for a break up fight. What happened? Did you cheat on her? Someone from the party last night?"

 "Not.. _really._ I think I'm in love _."_ He took a deep breath, and once again felt a knot form in his stomach. "With _Sansa."_

Robb laughed loudly as Jon's face remained serious. "You're _joking_ right?"

  Jon shoved his hands in his pockets and shook his head. 

  Robb's jaw twitched. "You're in love with my _sister?_ Your _cousin? Your first cousin?"_

 _"Yes."_ Jon braced himself for what he knew was coming. Robb's eyes narrowed, and right as Jon nearly winced his eyes shut, for the blow _surely to come,_ he caught Robb glimpsing over his shoulder.

 "What the fuck-"

Jon turned around. His stomach dropped, recognizing Jaime Lannister's car driving up. A passenger with the most noticeable red head of hair sitting next to him. 

  _Sansa. Nooooo._

He stopped the car in front of them. She got out and bent down. "Thanks for the ride Jaime."

  She shut the car door, and turned to face them. Jon's mouth filled with bile. The smile on her face left nothing to the imagination. 

 "Sansa, what the _fuck?_ Why is Jaime Lannister dropping you off _?!"_ Robb yelled.

 "Because I needed a ride _."_ She answered innocently.

 "From _where?"_ Robb pushed. 

 "None of your _business."_ She walked past, brushing lightly against his shoulder.

  He caught a whiff of Jaime on the wisps of her hair and swallowed down the nausea churning in his stomach. She opened the front door and closed it behind her. 

 "Good luck with _that_ Jon." Robb stomped in the house and slammed the door shut. 

  Jon pulled the keys from his pocket, and tiredly walked to his truck. He needed to get out of here. He needed to get out of here _now._

 

 

  He walked up the steps, setting down two bags filled with presents and souvenirs, and prepared himself for what was sure to be an awkward homecoming. He heard footsteps on the other side of the door getting closer, before he'd even knocked. He straightened himself before it swung open. 

 "I thought I saw you pull up." She smiled sweetly. "Merry Christmas Jon."

  It had been seven months since he'd seen her. He stayed off social media, and changed phones and his number, to avoid any heartbreaking news over the worst mistake he almost made _.._ yet seeing her stand in front of him _,_ he, not for the first _time,_ wondered if it was his mistake _..for leaving._

 _"_ M-Merry Christmas Sansa." Jon tried his hardest not to sound like an idiot. 

  She stepped forward and closed the door behind her. Her smile dropped, and she reached through his hair with her fingers, and stunned him when her lips, warm and soft, crashed onto his. He couldn't believe what was happening. Just like _that.._ he melts back into her. He wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her close, unsure if the moment was _real._ She finally broke the kiss. He saw her heavy breaths in the cold air, her cheeks flushed red.

 "I _missed_ you." She almost pleaded. 

 "I missed You too _."_ He choked. 

 _"_ Are you all.. _settled in?_ Back home?"

 _"_ Yeah. _"_ He breathed shakily.

  Her fingers snuck their way under his jacket and traced down his chest. 

 " _Invite me over?"_ She asked playfully.

Jon stood there slack jawed, still in shock, wanting to taste her lips again, and wondering what the hell was going on.

 "I would loveto have you over Sansa." He said as steadily as he could. 

 "I would loveto come visit you Jon." She leaned closer, when Robb's voice thundered from behind her.

 "You two _finished?"_ He smiled over Sansa's shoulder. "Get in hereSnow..it's _freezing."_

_I was quite warm actually._

 

He walked into his room and started throwing clothes in the closet. He made his bed, collected random items strewn over his dresser and chair, opened his top drawer and dumped them in quickly. He had no intentions of Sansa walking in, and seeing how much of a slob he was. He wasn't _really.._ he just hadn't found the motivation to put his shit away since he got back. He had lived out of a bag for so long, he was use to it. He remembered the clothes he left on the bathroom floor and rushed out of his room, bumping into the door frame corner. Cursing through the pain, he ran into the bathroom and flicked the light on. 

  _Fuck. It smells like..a man lives here._

  His trimmed beard hairs littered the sink. The toilet seat was up. Clothes from last night still lay on the floor. His razor, and toiletries were sitting on the sink counter instead of the shelves. He reach for a rag under the sink and started wiping it down. Toothpaste resin, facial hair, random strands of his long hair, he needed it out of his life. He quickly organized his things and closed the shower curtain, put the seat down and turned the light off. 

  Racing to the kitchen, the least used room in the house, he put the two coffee cups in the dishwasher and wiped down the counter. Moving into the living room, he straightened couch pillows, hung his jacket up, and lined his shoes against the wall. Spinning around, he wiped sweat from his brow, trying to spot anything that might be out of place. 

  _Holy shit. It's hot._

He pulled his hoodie over his head, and ran to the thermostat. He lowered the heat, and pulled his t-shirt over his head, sniffing at himself. 

  _All good. I need to calm the fuck down. I'm so messed up. I spend 6 months traveling across Western Europe, escaping a disaster before it even happens..I'm back for one day and BAM..back in my head, my heart, consuming every thought..like it never belonged to me in the first place._

Robb pulled him aside tonight, and gave him a brief synopsis of the shitstorm that went down after he left. Sansa's affair with Jaime went public, and caused a riff between Robert and Ned. Robert defended his wife's brother, pointing out that Sansa was of age and it was all consensual. Jon would rather listen to knives screeching across ceramic plates, than listen to another word about Sansa and Jaime Lannister. Robb skipped through the specifics and got to the part where Sansa finally admitted to her parents that she had fallen in love with Jon. Robb told him to be thankful to Jaime, for no other reason than taking the stigma off being in love with your cousin preferable to fucking a man their dad's age. 

  Jon watched her all night. She looked across the room, always finding him, and smiling back every time their eyes met. He felt comfortable, without any of it being spoken. He told stories of the places he visited, answered everyone's questions about every city, and felt an underlying polite avoidance throughout dinner, that he escaped because of a broken heart. They had undoubtedly heard about breaking up with Ygritte immediately before leaving, everything else, must have made sense afterwards. He found himself more and more anxious for the night to end. 

  Sansa kept sneaking smoldering glances his way, and he tried to contain his enthusiasm by talking more than usual. It was exhausting. Sansa, being the last one to say goodbye, whispered in his ear. 

 "I'll be by in an hour _."_

He merely nodded his head and mumbled quickly. He looked at the clock on his dresser. She should be here in any moment. He snatched a rubber band off his dresser, quickly tied his hair back, and went through his drawer, pulling out the shirt he was most comfortable with wearing. Before he had a chance to put it on, he heard her voice echoing through his house.

 " _Helloooo?"_ She called out playfully. 

  Jon swallowed nervously, and poked his head out the door. "Hey Sansa, I was just putting on a shirt." 

  She grinned at him, arching her brow and snaked her head to the left to get a better look. "What _for?"_

Jon bundled his shirt in his hands and watched as she took one boot off and then the other. She unzipped her coat, letting it slip slowly down her arms, and hung it on the hook behind her. She wore tight black leggings, and a long tee that snugged around her hips. He stepped into the hallway, shirtless, his jeans hanging loosely on his hips. Her eyes scanned over him, crossing her arms to lift her shirt over her head, and threw it on his couch. She walked slowly toward him, every step leaving him breathless. Her long torso exposed, her nipples peeking through her sheer bra, her long hair bouncing around her shoulders down to her waist.

  Jon breathed shallow. In a few seconds he would touch what he was gawking at, and more _._ Saliva filled his mouth thinking of tasting every inch of her _._ As she neared, her hands reached behind her back, undoing her bra, and letting the straps fall off her shoulders. Jon held his breath, as it fell from her perky breasts, to the floor. Suddenly she was so close to him, he felt the heat from her body against his chest. 

  She wasted no time touching him. She placed her hand softly against his bare chest, and moved it up until her nails scratched lightly through his beard. She licked her top lip, and at the very sight of her tongue, Jon couldn't hold back another second. His lips caught her tongue, pressing firmly against her mouth, grunting as he felt her skin pressing against him, leaving absolutely no space between them. His body reacted _instantly._ He was already hard when she walked through the door, now he was _throbbing_ beneath his jeans. 

  Her hands explored his bare back, slipping down his pants and squeezing his ass. He lunged forward, pushing her against the wall and kissed down her neck until he hungrily took her nipple in his mouth. Her hands, still on his ass, pulled him into her, grinding against his erection and mewling heavily as he nipped at her. He wanted so badly to go slowly, but it had been _months.._ and this was _Sansa._ He wasted seven months trying to get over her and within a breath, was back in love.

Determined to taste her first, he lifted her off her feet and threw her down on his bed. He pulled at her leggings, bringing her panties with them, down her long legs until they slipped through her feet. Jon took a moment to take in the sight of her. Nothing he'd ever lived through, up to this moment, had _taken_ him as much as Sansa. He found her _flawless,_ and feared he would never be in control of the lust more than the love.

_Fuck it, right now, lust wins._

His hands reached for her thighs, spreading them open, as he kneeled to lay between her legs. She gasped softly, as he caught the scent of her, and wasted no time, licking into her. His lips smacked together, savoring the taste of her before he needed _more._ Her head sunk so far back in the pillow, all he saw was her chin, as he drove his tongue deep through her swollen folds, and into her cunt as far as he could. Her hands grabbed his hair, loosening it from the rubber band, until she pulled it all free, threading her fingers through, and pulling at it while his tongue thrust inside where she held him, lapping up until his nose was buried in her mound.

 " _Jon..right there._ Don't stop _..ahhh Jon."_ She panted.

  Sansa writhed beneath his face, still guiding him with firm grasp in his hair, to go back down..and _in,_ pulling him up, circling her hips around his tongue. He picked up what she wanted, the ministrations she was controlling, finally convinced of this when her grip gradually loosened. She rubbed her heels against his legs, lifting her hips to his face, and he lapped her so hungrily, he thought he might cum, simply by giving her oral, and listening to her moans becoming more desperate, achy, and breathless. 

  He could do this all _night,_ he thought as his tongue rapidly pumped in and out. 

 "I want you _inside me_ Jon _...please."_

He would never refuse her pleas. He rose, kneeling between her legs, and pulled his jeans off. Before he could get his feet out of them, her legs wrapped around his ass and pulled him forward until his cock landed in between her swollen, heated flesh. He paused, and held his breath, before sinking into the warmth of her tight, wet cunt. 

 " _Oh fuck..Sansa."_ He growled into her neck. 

  Her head sank back, crying out the moment he filled her.

 _"I've wanted this..I've wanted this for so long."_ She breathed.

  He lifted his hips, and plunged back into her. Again..and again, each time wincing at the ache of her tight pussy gripping his entire length, as he slid easily in and out. Her fingers dug into his bottom, guiding him higher, as her hips dug into the mattress. He knew the spot she wanted him to hit, and he quickly abided. Stroking her clit, as he thrust back into her, set her off. She moved more urgently, her breaths coming out in short bursts, and her nails sunken into his flesh.

 " _Jon..Jon..mmm ahh ah!"_ She whimpered as he felt her trembling thighs tighten around his hips.

Relieved that she was close, he allowed his own build up to take over, surprised that he lasted as long as he already had _._

_"Sansa..fuck..I'm..I'm.."_

_"Don't_ stop _! I'm coming Jon..don't stop..please."_

  She clamped down hard, burying her head against his neck, as Jon felt her heated breath, and the vibration of her gasps against his bare skin. He felt a cold sweat race through his body, and all the heat rushing to his groin. He couldn't hold it any longer. He pushed forward with a roar and came hard, biting down on her shoulder. He shuddered and pulled out enough to stroke down her clit, then slipped back inside her as she gasped sharply and he _felt it._ Her walls tightening around him, repeatedly. He shook over her body, continued to pulse inside her while she came around his cock.

 " _Aannhhh!"_ She screamed out. She trembled underneath him, moving him, until her muscles turned soft. "Oh _god"_

 _"_ Not GodSweetling." He breathed heavily. " _Jon."_

 " _Jon._ Yes. My Jon." She sighed.

Hearing his name come breathlessly from her lips while he was still inside her _,_ crushed him. She had a _terrible hold_ on him, and after the best sex of his _life_ _,_ he naturally assumed it would only get worse from here _._ He started to get up, when she pulled him back, laying him to her side. 

 " _Stay."_ She whined softly.

He lay cradled in her arm, while her fingers twirled through his hair. "I'm not going _anywhere_ Sansa."

  It occurred to him, that she was way too addictive to give up. He didn't know how things between her and Jaime ended, but he didn't think he'd let her go without a _fight._ He held her tightly, unsure if he'd ever let her go.. _at all._

 "Do you love me?" She asked, her voice slow and sincere.

  Jon lifted his head and met her eyes. "You have no idea how much. _"_

She smiled approvingly, and nodded. "Good, because I love you."

 

  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this Jonsa fans! After today..I felt the need to support my Ship. That's all I'm gonna say.


	5. Riding in Cars With Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime's back!! His POV

 

 

 

  He couldn't believe she was back, especially after the hell she surely endured after their families learned of their affair. He was carelessly stupid. An _idiot._ A cocky bastard, thinking he could roll up to her house and casually drop her off after their blissful night. He took the blame, for _all_ of it. He foolishly thought he was being a gentleman, and _maybe_ held on to the hope that her family might appreciate that..until pulling up and seeing her brother and that _bastard_ standing on the porch.

  It had been a year since it came to an abrupt end. It never really had a chance to _start_ really..but oh, how he wished it had _._ He'd been shunned by nearly every member of his family, _her family,_ and nearly everyone in town (though he didn't care much for themanyway) and thought she'd try to connectwith him. She didn't _._

  Reaching out to _her_ was pointless. He knew the Stark's well enough to know that they'd likely taken her phone away, disconnected service or just changed the number all together. A month after it all went down, he was three drinks in, when he tried to call her anyway, and someone he didn't know already had her old number.

  Tyrion was the only friend he had _._ He never made him feel like a piece of shitfor what he'd done, and actually seemed more interested in the thorough descriptions while making perverted jokes. Jaime remained tight lipped about her, wanting to show the respect he actually _felt_ for Sansa. She wasn't his _plaything, a whore, or a one night stand._ Had she simply been a few years older, they might have even been able to start dating..without the backlash.

_What a ridiculous notion..this is the Stark's and their precious children..they would NEVER be okay with a Lannister, much less, one fucking their daughter._

Come Christmas, enough time had passed to actually get the annual invite to his sister's dinner. His father encouraged him to go, and insist the past be put behind them.. _all of them.._ so no talking about it..ever _._ Fair enough, no talk of the passionate _albeit very brief_ affair he had with 18 year old Sansa Stark, and bring presents, and be generous and full of smiles.

  _Yes sir. No sir. Nods. Everything is great. Smiles._

He overheard Myrcella's conversation with Trystane, about Jon being back after seven months of living like a gypsy in Europe.

  _Well well. Hope the little bastard finally grew the balls to go after her. They're likely already together._

Cersei finally spoke to him shortly after that, curtly asking that he slow down his drinking. 

  _Six fucking months..and THIS is how she breaks the silence._

Months passed, and Jaime felt comfortable enough to visit his niece when she came home from school. He found out, through eavesdropping, that Sansa and Jon _did_ get together.

  _So..they're fine with cousins dating, and not me. Fucking Stark's._

She hadn't started school yet, but planned on applying to the K.L. School of Design, a mere two hour drive from here. 

  _Forget it Jaime..it's already been a year. The girl used you to get over the love of her life, at the cost of alienating her family. Leave well enough alone._

Another summer, another graduation. This time Tommen's, and _this time_ it was his _sister_ who needed to slow down her drinking. By the end of the night, she'd touched him so often, he slammed her against the wall at the bottom of the basement stairs, and fucked her furiously. He hadn't toucheda woman since Sansa and lasting long was not going to happen.

They slipped back into their routine shortly after. She'd visit him, carrying various excuses in a bag to bring him, and beg to be licked, and fucked and held. He _did,_ without mercy _,_ taking her, in more vile waysthan he ever had before. Everything he tried, only spurred her on. He whispered nasty things in her ear, was rough with her. He put it in her ass, demanded she suck him off, calling her a whore while he fucked her mouth. He pulled, bit, spanked, and pounded her relentlessly. Angry fucking is all he ever seemed to want from her nowadays, and she took it.. _all of it.._ and still wanted to be held afterwards. 

  Then, one day, Sansa came to him. She was in the loveliest summer dress he'd ever seen. Her hair bounced around her shoulders, red and wild, over her doll white skin. He held his breath at the sight of her, squinting at the sight as though she were a mirage. 

 " _Sansa..my god, come HERE."_ He pulled her close. 

  His lips were on hers before she could utter a word. He longed to taste her again. When his tongue slipped inside he was shocked that she tasted of old sour wine. He pulled back and saw her laughing at him. Her laugh was piercing and shrill. He started to back away until he felt her claws sink into his chest.

 " _Jaime!"_

He snapped his head off the pillow and felt a cold sweat shiver through his body. His hair matted to his forehead when Cersai swiped it away with her finger. She held both his arms and stroked down to his elbow, as he tried to catch his breath and shake the dream off.

 "It's just a nightmare Jaime."

  He gathered his wits and looked around the bright room. "What time is it?" He breathed. 

 "It's 2..we napped after _..remember?"_

  That's right. She came here a little after 10, pastries and coffee in hand and woke him in bed. He went down on her and flipped her over to take her from behind before falling back asleep.

 _"_ You should _go_ Cersei."

 "What?" She asked sitting up. "I should-go  _where?"_

 _"_ I don't care, back home maybe?I have somewhere to be and I need to get ready _."_

He quickly got out of bed and walked to his bathroom without looking back. He could feelthe heat of her stare at the back of his head, before closing the door and locking it behind him.

 

  It was 5 when he finally pulled up to the campus. He had no information to go on. He had no number he could call to get it. He didn't even know what propelled him to drive two hours away out of the blue on the off chance that he might actually see her. Parking the car in a lot beside the main building, he got out of his car, and took his sunglasses off. Several groups of girls sat under the shade of trees in front of him, while his eyes wandered around. A group of girls by the entrance stared in his direction and he heard their giggles when he averted his eyes and looked the opposite direction. That's when he saw red and stopped breathing.

_Unmistakable._

_That hair._

_Those lips._

_Sansa._

He wasn't aware that his breathing had stopped until an ache formed deep in his chest. After looking upon her forever _,_ he finally lifted his feet from glue they were stuck in, and walked her way. She was knitting, no, sketching. He smiled to himself and nearly stopped in his tracks when Sansa raised her head, and spotted him.

 "My God,  _Jaime?"_ She smiled.

  He noticed something behind it. _Sympathy? Sadness? Concern? Relief?_ It seemed like all of the above. She dropped whatever she was working on, and stood quickly. He wasn't prepared for her to be quite so excited to see him, when she skipped forward and threw her arms around his neck. He lifted her off the ground and groaned happily into her neck. 

 "Sansa. Jesus, it's so good to see you." The sentiment poured from his mouth.

  Her warm cheek touched his ear. "You too Jaime." She whispered softly. 

  He set her down and saw undoubtably, sadness across her face. "Are you _alright?"_

She bit her lip and looked over his shoulder. The corner of her lip crept up. "Same car?" She asked, avoiding his question. 

  He turned to look back. "Oh.. _yeah."_ He answered, looking back at her.

 "Let's get out of here for a minute..take me for a drive." 

  She turned to gather her things, shoved them in a saggy tote and walked back, grabbing his hand. He looked down at the gesture and stared for a moment. 

 "You _sure?"_

She nodded. "Positive."

 

  He became more familiar with the surrounding area as he reacquainted himself with the countryside of his youth. He attended school here as well, but it was the University, and it was 22 years ago..before Sansa was even born. He was grateful for how little the outskirts changed, remembering how often he'd sneak out with his friends..and the occasional rendezvous with his sister _._ He shook the thought from his head.

 "You went here right?" Sansa asked. 

 "Yes, a very long time ago." He grinned. 

 "Hmm..is it how you remembered? _"_

He sighed. "Yes..and _no._ That was a different _time._ I was a different personthen." He couldn't smile at the memory.

  Her hand reached out to touch his knee. His breath caught and he nearly winced. " _Sansa."_ He breathed. 

  She slowly started to move her hand up his thigh. "I never..we never.." He could hear her voice cracking. "..got to say _goodbye."_ The rest came out quickly.

He swallowed. "Your parents _.._ you and Jon happened.." It pained him so much to say his name, he couldn't even complete the sentence.

  She withdrew her hand, placing it on her lap. "That's over _."_ She fumbled her fingers nervously. "I don't want to talk about that Jaime." 

 "Okay..what should we talk about then, the weather? Your classes?" He asked sarcastically.

 "I don't want to talk at all _."_ She spat. "Just take me back." 

  He saw the dirt road they use to take and made a sharp right turn. Speeding down the road, his ill epuipt sports car hit every bump with a bang until he slid to a halt by the trees. They both unbuckled their seat belts and angrily got out of the car in unison.

  Sansa's hand smacked down on his roof. "What the fuck Jaime, I said take me _back!_ Not drive like a mad man into the damn _woods!"_

She walked around to the front of the car and put her hands on her hips. Her chest was heaving in anger. 

 "Why did you _come here?"_ Her voice like _ice,_ and coming from her, so unfamiliar.

He was suddenly at a loss for words. She was so _beautiful._ Even more beautiful when she was pissed _._ Her eyes were as fieryas her hair, and in this moment, looking at her, his groin reacted.

 "Jaime, why are you _here?"_ She repeated. 

 "I..I needed to see you _."_ His throat was dry.

 "Well, you've _seen_ me. Can you take me back now _?"_ She hissed. 

  His blood was racing _,_ and now,  _HE_ was pissed. 

 " _Why?_ Why did you hug me? Hold my hand _?"_ He started stepping closer to her, his eyes narrowing into hers. "We never got to say  _goodbye?_ You ready to say ' _goodbye'_ to me _now_ Sansa?" 

  Before she could take a step back, his hand caught her arm and pulled her close. He wrapped his fingers around her delicate wrist when she tried to pull away. Her eyes and nostrils flared close to his face. 

 "It's been a year _._ I was just..happy to see a familiar face _."_ She said flatly.

 "Happy to see a familiar face." He mocked, an inch from her face. Pressing his erection against her hip, his lips brushed her cheek. "Not excited to feel a familiar cock?"

  Her breathing was shallow and she stiffened. "No. I feel nothing _."_ She replied through clenched teeth. 

 _"_ Is that so?" He smirked.

He twisted her around by her wrist and pushed her over the hood. Any concern over hurting her, or doubt that hed gone too far, dissipated as soon as she bent over and raised her ass. He lifted her skirt over her ass as her arms spread across the hood in front of her while he held her down and smiled at her pretty, rounded bottom pushed up. She didn't struggle to free herself from his grasp when he slid his hand between her thighs, finding her underwear already soaked through. His fingers circled outside the fabric and traced up and down where he desperately wanted to be. Pushing his index finger up her core he heard an unmistakable moan and looked down to see her mouth open.

 "That's a whole lot of _nothing_ sweetheart." 

  She whimpered softly as Jaime teased her entrance with his fingers. He traced up to her clit, and groaned when she pushed her ass back, making him throb in his pants. He pushed his erection against her, finally slid her panties to the side, and sunk two fingers into the wet cunt he'd been dreaming of for a year _._

  He wanted to fuck her _._ Wanted her to scream his name until she lost her voice. He moved his fingers inside her, feeling her getting more wet, and slicker with each pump. She moaned loudly, moving down and up his hand until he felt her thighs trembling. He was good with his fingers, and smiled at the familiarity of the first time he made her cum.

 "There's the girl I rememeber _..so tight, so fucking wet..and so eager to come for me."_

He let go of her wrists, reached for his button and pulled his pants down until his cock sprang free. Taking his fingers out of her, he pulled her panties down below her ass and guided himself between her legs. Once he felt the head of his cock resting between her swollen wet lips, he wanted to thrust into her straight away, but hesitated.

 "Tell me you _want_ this Sansa." He demanded.

  She squirmed beneath him, trying to back onto him, when he pulled back.

 "What do you saysweetheart?"

  She panted hard and her body lowered in defeat. "I _.._ I want you Jaime.I want your cock back inside me. _Please fuck me._   _"_ She writhed again as she begged.

  Her pleas got him so hot, he entered her without making her wait another second. Pushing deep inside her, he shut his eyes in the pure ache of filling her tight, hot cunt.

 " _Fuck..Sansa."_ He groaned.  

  He felt dizzy for a second, and landed over her back. Pulling out a few inches, he sunk back inside and felt it all over again. Her arms spread over the hood like wings, Jaime looked up to see her fingertips bent into the hood and reached around with both hands to grab her breasts. He started moving quicker, but kept a steadypace as he wanted to last as long as he could. He raised his hand to his lips, put his finger in his mouth and slicked it up generously, before reaching around again, this time to her clit. He moved it up and down, then rolled small circles around her nub until she was clawing the hood like an animal.

  He knew she was about to come. Her hot, high moans, became screams as he pounded into her, smacking against her ass loudly. He was hot, hot everywhere, the sweat from their bodies slap loudly as he throbbed inside her. Squeezing him from the top all the way down his shaft, she became more wet, making it easier to glide in and out of her. His thrusts became harder when he heard her screams, her cries of pleasure, and it brought him to the edge immediately. 

 _"_ Jaime I'm _coming..I'm..oh god..Jaime..fuck!"_

 _"_ Thats my girl, cumming aroundcmy cock. I want to feel it Sansa." He panted heavily as he felt ready to explode.

 " _Yes Jaime. God..yes!"_

She began clenching around him and slammed her palms flat against the hood. Her moans came in high pitched bursts as her body shuddered beneath his. His stomach burned, when he dug his fingers into the soft flesh of her hips before ramming into her, spilling inside with a primal growl. His body jerked over her back, against her ass, her thighs, as he pulsed into Sansa and tried to find breath. 

 "Fuck.. _fuck Sansa."_ He panted.

  Both _depleted,_ he briefly lay over her limp back for a minute. She turned her face over, resting her cheek on the car, still breathing heavily. He stood and slowly pulled out of her. She started to get up when he walked back to his car door and pulled a shirt from the back seat, fearing the aftermath.

 "Here, you can use this _."_ He offered.

She cleaned herself quickly and handed him back the shirt with a small smile on her lips. 

 "What Sansa.was that.." His words were interrupted by her quick step forward and suddenly her lips on his.

  They tasted _sweet,_ nothing like his nightmare. When she pulled back she was beaming. He buttoned his pants and smiled back, relieved.

 "Take me to dinner Jaime..I'm _ravenous."_ She growled.

 "Anywhere you want _._ Anything. Anything you want _."_ He insisted.

  Before they got back in the car she looked at him over the roof. "Jaime?"

 "Yeah?"

 "Don't bring him up again _."_ She said in all seriousness. 

He nodded. "I won't Sansa."

  He didnt care to bring up Jon's name ever again. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know..I gave you such a sweet Jonsa moment..but it's chapter 4 y'all. Surely you didn't assume I would wrap a pretty bow on this fic in 4 chapters. There's more to the story, hence the tags. Hope you enjoyed this one! Thanks for reading, everyone!


	6. This Morning, We Were Happy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The explanation. All Jon's POV.

 

 

 

  He tossed around in bed like he had for months, keeping his eyes closed in fear of looking at the clock. It had to be past one. He hadn't had a good night's sleep since he moved here, and knew exactly why. His mind started to wander when his phone vibrated on the nightstand. He opened his eyes. 2:37 a.m. _Perfect._ He grabbed his phone off the nightstand and groaned when he saw Robb's name.

 "You know I'm 6 hours ahead of you right?" 

 "Don't act like you were sleeping." Robb snapped.

 "What is it, everyone okay?"

 "We have a problem Jon."

  He held his breath. He knew by Robb's tone what it was. Sansa. 

 "How..w-when?"

 "He had to have visited her, and I don't know when. Recently, maybe a few days ago."

  Jon sighed, rubbing his temple and forehead. 

 "She won't answer anyone's calls, and for some reason, Cersei is up in arms about it, driving Uncle Robert so crazy he's come to the house. He drank too much, and passed out on the couch."

 "What do you want me to do about it Robb, she's an adult. She's made her choice and has every right to do so." He sighed heavily. 

  The words came out of his mouth, and even if they were true, he didn't feel it. He wanted to come out of his skin right now, but Robb would only encourage him.

 "She made her choice because of the choice _you_ made, you moron _._ " 

  _Here we go._

 _"_ You have an entire family surrounding you. Both your parents, sisters and brothers, I have one. One damn person I'm connected to-"

 "That's bullshit Jon. _We_ are your family. Sansa was family, she would have made you her family _forever,_ she loved you, and you left her for a _stranger."_

 _"_ She's not a stra- _look,_ what's done is done, and she clearly loved me enough to wait three whole months before running back to Jaime fucking Lannister!"

  He yelled the last three words and hung up. He knew it was only a matter of time before she sought comfort, for the heart he crushed three months ago...

 

  _They were on the couch watching one of her shows. Her long legs stretched out over his lap and he spent the better part of an hour caressing her legs under her pajama bottoms. He was watching TV with her and trying to get interested, but it was hard. Literally._

_She moaned in protest when he stopped massaging her calf._

_"Why'd you stop?" She whined._

_He grinned. "Because I need to..calm down. Touching you is turning me on, and you're watching this." His eyes went to the TV._

_She paused the show and threw the controller down on the table._

_"I'd rather watch you on top of me." She teased._

_Jon arched a brow and slowly tugged at her pants. She lifted her butt and her feet while he pulled them off. Her right leg draped off the couch as he crawled slowly between her, stopping to kiss her upper thigh. He looked up to see her biting her bottom lip with her eyes squeezed shut._

_He kissed down, closer in between her thighs until the scent of her drove him mad, and he lifted her up from under her thighs. He licked her from bottom to the top, thrusting back down to thrust small strokes inside her cunt, before licking back up. Teasing her from the bottom drove her crazy, he let the tip of his tongue lick around, then into the tight hole until she was bucking forward into his mouth. He felt her fingers through his hair, tugging softly at first then forcefully as his tongue plunged in and out of her._

_Her whimpers became short whining gasps as she jerked on his hair and dug her ass deep into the couch. He knew she was ready to come and lapped around her clit, sliding two fingers inside her wet cunt, before feeling her clenching around them. Her thighs trembled around his face as she grasped his hair and cried out. Her shaky, broken moans echoed in his living room, and spurred him on to lick her more, while his cock throbbed to be inside her, he wanted to keep feeling and hearing her climax._

_"Ohhh ahhh fuck..Jon!"_ She gasped. 

  He finally slowed his tongue, sliding his fingers out of her and not able to resist tasting them. She propped herself up on her elbows and smiled down at him. Her eyes briefly darted to the coffee table when he heard his phone vibrate. 

 " _Who's_.. _Dany?" She asked, still breathless._

_Fuck._

_She practically lived with him now. She had clothes in his drawer, her toothbrush, makeup, shampoo and hair dryer had found their way into his bathroom. Her favorite creamer was in his fridge for christ sake, and after months of bliss with her, he'd forgotten to mention Dany. Maybe not forgotten, as much as she had just taken over his life. He was so blissfully happy with her, he put meeting Dany to the back of his mind._

_He sat up, his eyes darted to his phone and saw that he'd missed her call. He looked back at Sansa, her eyes wide, blue, and curious._

_"Dany is my Aunt..from my father's..my father's side." He said softly._

_"Your Aunt? She looks young." Sansa said flatly._

_Damn profile picture. She was beautiful and young, and right now her profile picture was a closeup of her face, her perfect white teeth through a huge smile, and her almost white, blonde hair swept around her face._

_Jon nodded. "Well, yeah. She's my age." He almost winced, this wasn't going well._

_"Hmm." Sansa scooted up and sat with her feet on the floor._

_"Sansa I'm sorry I didn't tell you about her. I met her when I was in Spain. She found me online and sent me a message about being related and told me if I ever wanted to meet.." He mumbled the rest as he saw Sansa's eyes starting to narrow._

_"You met her while you were away? You left to meet her?"_

_"Sansa, I was crushed when I saw you with Jaime that morning." She scoffed and a pang of anger shot through him. "Yes. Crushed. I'd just broken things off with Ygritte about five minutes before you were driven up the driveway to do your walk of shame in front of me and Robb." He didn't know why he jumped so quickly to being defensive, and why he'd take a shot like that at her. He knew why actually, he was still pissed._

_"So you flew to Europe to meet your young bleach-blonde Aunt to help you get over me?" She spat._

_"Sansa it wasn't like that! We're related!"_

_"So are WE Jon! And you just had your face between my legs! Did you do that with her?"_

_"No! Sansa stop, that's not-we're getting off the point here."_

_"Okay Jon, what was the point in you not telling me that while you were on your heartbreak tour in Europe, you met a surviving member of your father's side of the family, who's young, and beautiful and is calling you with her pretty face blasting across your phone."_

_He tilted his head and wondered how it escalated so far as to elicit such a childish remark. Did she realize how ridiculous this all was?_

_"I came back..and nothing else has mattered since I saw you." He said as he reached for her hand._

_For a second, he thought she'd take his hand into hers and calm down, but her flaring nostrils said otherwise. Sure enough, she pulled away from him and stood up, walking into the kitchen._

_"Sansa, what are you doing." He asked as he got up to follow her._

_She whipped around, her wild locks chasing her head and bouncing around her shoulders._

_"We've spent almost every waking moment with each other since you've come back. You told me about where you've been, what you've seen, even random people you've met, and yet you didn't mention HER Jon. I'm just so curious as to why._

_"Yes, that's what you look like right now..curious." He huffed._

_"Okay I'm pissed! Why? Why didn't you tell me about her?"_

_"Because I've been struggling with a decision about going back!"_

_Sansa took a step back, her eyes widened in shock. "What?" She breathed._

_He took a deep breath, and knew right then, he fucked up. This was his fuck up and she had every right to be pissed._

_"She was left her father's business after her brother was killed. She offered me a job in the company after we got to know each other..and NOT that way Sansa. Nothing happened. We just spent some time getting to know each other. She had a lot of stories to tell me about my father's side of the family, and I wanted to know. I've never known him. She barely did either, but she grew up with his side of the family, and had a lot more insight than I've ever heard. We became close. I feel close to her. Can you understand that?"_

_Sansa was chewing on her nails and he could see tears rimming her eyes. She blinked and a single tear rolled down her cheek, breaking his heart._

_"Sansa I'm sorry. Please..I love you. I love you so much, I'd all but forgotten the only family I have since we-"_

_"The only family you HAVE?" She choked. "Dany didn't raise you. She didn't wake you up on Christmas morning. She didn't bounce you on her knee when you were 7 years old. She didn't run like lightening off the boat slip to cannonball into the river every summer. You just MET her. You HAVE a family Jon..you were raised by your family."_

_He swallowed hard. She was right of course, but so was he. How could he make her understand?_

_"You're right, you're right Sansa."_

_She started to grab for her keys on the counter and raced by him, pulling a jacket off the rack._

_"Sansa, you can't leave now, we're not done!"_

_"I'm done. I can't listen to anymore right now. I'm going home." She jerked the door open and slammed it shut in his face._

_He shut his eyes and took a deep breath. He twisted the handle and pulled the door open, watching her in slippers, pajama pants and his jacket as she angrily got in her car. Under normal circumstances, he would have laughed at the sight, but this was far from funny._

_"Sansa get back in here and let's talk about this like adults please!"_

_"Go call your 'family' back asshole." She shot back before closing the car door and speeding away._

_Another angry redhead peeling away. Great._

_He walked back into the house and slumped on the sofa, turning his head to look at the spot she'd just been so happy laying in. He covered his face with both hands as his head fell back, and groaned loudly. His phone started to vibrate once more. He opened his eyes and saw her face again. Sitting up, he picked up his phone and pressed the green call button._

_"Hey Dany."_

 

_He pulled up to the Stark's, sitting behind the wheel after turning it off. He had some explaining to do, and it was going to have to start with the man of the house. He realized the huge mistake of keeping Dany from them. At first, he tried to blame it on how quickly things moved with Sansa the moment he came back, but he knew he could have just told them that night. He planned to, planned to tell them that he met her, and after spending some time getting to know her, she'd made an offer to sit with her on the board of his Grandfather's company._

_All of that went to shit after Sansa answered the door and kissed him. What made matters worse, was the Stark's accepting their relationship. That's what stopped him. They rallied behind him to be with her, however desperately inclined they were forced to accept their daughter dating her cousin, didn't matter. That night, he saw the way they admired the two of them falling in love openly, in front of their eyes, and smiled._ _He was so grateful for it, grateful for her, and after that night, he could think of no one else. She was everything, and he happily shut the rest of the world out._

_Dany continued to message him, asking when he was coming back. He simply responded with "Taking longer than I thought. I'll let you know soon." He didn't tell her about Sansa. He didn't tell Sansa about her. He kept thinking the right moment to bring it up would present itself, and he knew he was wrong for thinking it. Sansa discussed going to school. Her parents agreed to let her have a break from going to school for a year, and that was more than enough. She wanted to work on her future, start doing something that would bring her closer to what she was passionate about, but admitted that it would tear her apart to leave him behind._

_They were still new, but she made him feel like she'd love him forever, and the possibility of being a mere two hours away from her was hard enough. He was stalling, and this..was inevitable._

_Ned and Robb had sat back and listened quietly to the whole story being told. He started at the beginning. They nodded until he got to the part about this morning, specifically the part he could hold off no longer._

_"So, I'm going to go. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity and I'd-we would never want for anything for the rest our lives." He still had Sansa in mind for the future._

_"You're doing this for money?" Robb squinted at him._

_"No Robb. Did you hear anything I just said?"_

_"Let me get this straight. You fell in love with my sister. She broke your heart and you leave and meet this mysterious Aunt you've only known about for a year and a half. She's president of your Grandfather's company in Europe, and offers you, her only family who she's never met before a seat on the board. You come back, start seeing my sister and we barely see the two of you for three months straight and NOW..you're moving away from your life here, and the only family you've ever known, for what? To be close to this Aunt of yours?"_

_"Robb." Ned warned._

_"No Dad, I really want to understand. Sansa's shut in her room upstairs, this one comes walking in here, finally telling us about all this..it's going to kill her. She'll be..she'll BREAK if you leave her Jon."_

_"Are you coming back?" Ned asked sternly._

_"Yes." He swallowed. "After she teaches me the ropes and I spend enough time on the board, learning how to run the business, she hopes I'll be able to open an office in the City."_

_"How long will that be?" Robb asked._

_"I don't know yet." He folded his hands. "Two maybe three years?"_

_"You're leaving for three YEARS?" Sansa asked loudly from behind them._

_"Sansa." He breathed. "Sweetling, please-"_

_Too late. She was already storming out the front door. He was on his feet and running after her. When he opened the door, his heart dropped. She sat on the bottom step with her head in her hands, sobbing uncontrollably._

_"Sansa." He whispered, sitting next to her on the step._

_"You..you talked to her..one conversation and that's IT? I..I love you Jon."_

_His chest tightened in one huge knot as he tried to breathe. "I love you too. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone in my life Sansa."_

_"Then why are you doing this? Why are you leaving? How could you LEAVE?"_

_He took a deep breath and felt the pain in his chest again. "Sansa you are nineteen years old. You haven't even started school yet. What kind of man would I be if I asked you to give up everything you've dreamed of doing just to be by my side from this day forward?"_

_"You'd be mine Jon. I am yours." She cried._

_"I'll always be yours Sansa, this doesn't have to change that. We would be apart for two years while you go to school-"_

_"Two hours apart Jon! Two hours! Not another fucking continent!"_

_He felt defeated. She was right. He felt selfish. This was a mistake._

_"I'll call her Sansa. I'll..I'll explain I just can't leave. Not now." He reached for her hand._

_She pulled away from his touch. "You've said yes?""_

_He tightened his jaw and nodded._

_"You kept this from me for three months straight, thought about taking her up on her offer before you showed up at our door on Christmas, start a romantic affair with me and one fight..and you told her YES?"_

_He felt cornered. Nothing he could say was going to make this right. She listened to him talk to Ned and Robb and knew everything. He couldn't feel more terrible than he did right now._

_"I'm sorry. Sansa I'm so sorry..let me fix this. I can fix it."_

_"No Jon. You can't. I..I won't be in a relationship with someone who lies."_

_"I didn't lie to you."_

_She shot him a look, and he cowered. "Come with me." He pleaded._

_She looked as though she pondered it for a moment then shook her head._

_"I need to start school." More tears rolled down her cheeks. "I could have made long distance work Jon. It would have worked."_

_"It still can Sansa please..please don't."_

_"Don't what? You came here to do it didn't you..I'm just beating you to it."_

_"I didn't come here to break up with you Sansa-"_

_"Well I'm breaking up with you. You can chase this dream of yours, and learn your other family's business-"_

_He stopped her with a desperate kiss. He couldn't take the heartbreak of it anymore. Her cheeks were wet on his, and he winced when he felt her push him away. Her eyes still closed, she held her hand against his chest and slowly stood._

_"Goodbye Jon."_

_No. No. How did it come to this? This couldn't be happening. He woke up with her arms draped over him this morning and now she was saying goodbye. He got up to rush back into the house after her, and stopped when Robb opened the door._

_"She's already upstairs. You'd better go."_

_"Robb..I love her..please."_

_"I'll talk to her Jon, but-"_

_He reluctantly turned to leave as Robb's words died in his throat._

 

He picked up his phone and texted her. 

  **_I need to talk to you. Come down real quick._**

He knew Dany would be awake. They both suffered from insomnia, only hers was actual insomnia. His was just..

  A light knock at his door and he quickly walked from his room to open it. They lived in the same building. One floor, two penthouses. One hers and the other, his. She wore a silk slip dress under her robe, with her hair loosely hanging around her shoulders. She was very beautiful, and it caught Jon off guard. They had many late night talks, but she usually wore pants and a t-shirt, not this. He saw more of her than he ever had before. 

 "What's wrong?" She asked. 

 "Word from home. Sansa." He sighed. 

  She tightened her lips and looked at him sympathetically. 

 "Want to talk about it?"

 "Please." He nodded.

  She moved past him through the door and towards the living room. Walking over to the liquor cabinet, she pulled out the bottle of red she kept there and poured two glasses. She was the only friend he had here, and this was just another late night chat. He sat on the couch, and instead of taking the seat across from him, she stepped closer to sit next to him. Her left arm rested behind his head as she drew the glass of wine to her lips and drank. 

 "Tell me what happened."

  He laid it all out for her, finally revealing parts of their past she didn't know about yet. He never told her about Jaime, until now, he left Jaime out of it. Talking about him to Dany, did what it had always done whenever he thought about that bastard, it pissed him off. She could see it. Her eyes widened many times during the story and he ran through it quickly. 

 "I mean, she's not a child. They can't lock her up, I don't know what they expect me to do."

 "They expect you to go back and rescue her from the bad, scary man who's twice her age Jon."

 "He's not bad." He couldn't believe he was saying it. "And he's far from scary..most women think he's quite-ugh.. _charming."_

 _"_ Hmm..jealous?" She teased.

 "Shut up." He downed the wine in his glass. "Yes, I am jealous. But not like _that._ I'm really pissed off Dany."

 "I can tell." She said, leaning forward to pour more wine.

 "Should I go back? Talk to her? I could bring her back here with me, there are tons of design schools here. I could make her happy. I could make it right."

 "Wait, you're going to go back and try to draw her away from this hot, charming older man who she's been in a relationship with before? No. Jon. If she wanted you, she'd be with you _."_

  The thought of her being with Jaime made him sick to his stomach. He was burning with anger and sat his glass down before he broke it. She set hers down and lay the same hand on his knee, while her fingers twirled the back of his hair. Jon felt chills at her touch. She moved to sit closer to him, keeping her hand on his knee. He searched her eyes, suddenly serious, and now burning into his. 

 "Why did you call me down here?" She softly asked.

  Oh god no. Not for that. He didn't call her for that. He just needed to talk. 

  Her hand snaked up his thigh, fingernails scraped into his flesh, before she was about three inches from his cock, which, to his horror, was growing. He slapped his hand down hard over hers and shot her a warning glance. 

 "Dany, what are you doing? I didn't ask you here for that." 

 "I'm doing what Targaryen's do." 

  She leaned over and pressed her lips onto his. His hand somehow loosened and let her move further up his thigh until she was cupping his cock over his pants. She moved her body closer against his, her leg draped over his thigh as her fingers gripped around and started pumping, thrusting her tongue into his mouth, she moaned.

  His fingers went through the back of her hair to pull her closer when he felt ice cold. He snapped back and pushed her off him when eyes snapped open.

 "What? What's the matter?" She panted.

 "It feels..this is _wrong_ Dany. I can't do this, I'm sorry, you need to go."

 "What?" 

  He untangled from her and stood quickly. She reached out to touch him and he stepped back. 

 "You're hard, just _now_ , you were ready to fuck me. You're _still_ hard." She snapped.

 "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry Dany, I..I didn't mean to mislead you."

  She scoffed and picked up her glass, downing it in one gulp. 

 "Get some sleep, we have a meeting in 5 hours." 

  With that, she buzzed out of his room and shut the door hard behind her. 

  He didn't sleep at all that night.

 

  Another Christmas, the same damn porch, only he knew Sansa wouldn't be on the other side of the door this time. He rented his house to Sam and Gilly so he drove a rental from the airport and had to stay at the Stark's for the holidays. It wasn't the Stark's. It was his home. The home he grew up in. This was his family. Everyone inside this house loved him. He should have felt happier than he did to be home, but sadness overwhelmed him. 

  This time Arya answered the door. She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tight. 

 "I'm so glad you came back for Christmas Jon!"

  He closed his eyes and hugged her tight. "Me too Arya."

  As she led him into the house, he was both relieved and heartbroken not to see Sansa. Robb had his girlfriend over. Arya had introduced him to her boyfriend. The boys, both taller than him now, wanted to hear all about Dany, who they made clear, was the hottest woman he knew. Ned and Cat insisted Jon eat until he couldn't move, and no one mentioned Sansa through the entire evening. After a long shower, he went to the spare room and looked at his phone. Dany texted him to wish him a happy holiday with his family, and warned him not to do anything stupid. He chuckled at the text. She knew very well, he was capable of resisting doing something stupid..like fucking your Aunt, but knew what and _who_ she meant. 

  He lay in bed, unable to sleep for what seemed like hours. He had no idea how long he'd slept, when he felt movement beside him in bed. He assumed he was dreaming until he felt the soft touch of of her hand over his stomach.

 "Welcome home Jon." She purred.

  His whole body flushed with warmth, and he nearly wept. 

 " _Sansa."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was hard...REALLY hard for me to write that part with Dany and Jon, as they're my NoTP..and I know I'm a hypocrite as I have Sansa being screwed by Jaime, but it's a hell of a lot easier for me to write that than it is for me to even imagine..the other. 
> 
> Ill be posting an update to this ASAP.


	7. Truth be Told

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jon is back, and Jaime's truth comes out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To Janina: ❤️

 

 

 

 "What..Sansa what are you doing here?"

  Her hand lay close enough to feel his heart racing, and she slowly lay her head over his chest. She felt his muscles, still tense under her arm and closed her eyes, hoping no more words would be spoken. It was too painful, and she didn't want anymore pain. This, this right here, is all she wanted..for now. Could he just breathe, wrap his arms around her body and hold her? That would say more than any words he could possibly speak. 

  Moving only to nestle closer to him, her head moved with his chest as his breath steadied. He gave in and began moving his arm around her shoulder with an exasperated sigh. Perhaps he needed this as much as she did. Maybe he read her mind. In all likeliness, this simply felt good. It felt natural. It required no revelation. No words.

_I'll just curl up and fall asleep in your arms as comfortably as I have known, and my real life exhausts me more than it should. I find myself overwhelmed with thoughts of how stubborn I am, and I want it to change Jon. I don't deserve you. Why can't we just say it? It's too much._

_It's too much._

His heart slowed under her ear, his body eased when she heard his head shift on the pillow. She welcomed the slow rythym of his breathing and let her mind rest as they both fell asleep.

 

Missing the warmth of his embrace while she walked downstairs, Sansa wrapped the collar of her robe around her shoulders and rounded the steps into the kitchen. She glanced at the time on the microwave and sighed while opening the fridge door. Taking a bottle of water, she turned and gasped sharply at the figure across the counter. 

"Jesus Robb-"

"Home for the holidays San?"

Sansa allowed the fridge door to shut leaving only the light from above the oven, she couldn't see her brother's face anymore. 

"Y-yeah..um, yeah." She stumbled, she knew it was coming.

"Hmm, would've been nice if Mom knew."

_Okay, this was to be expected._

Her throat became more dry than what drove her downstairs in the first place. She twisted the cap and took several gulps before she breathed. Robb would call her out on her shit without holding back, and this was the moment for it. She tried to think of something, anything to say. Of course, she had thought of exactly what to say, but a lot had been added to her explanation as of late and it sounded more and more ridiculous in her head. The thought of claiming legitimate insanity was considered, until her stubborn nature devoured it. 

"Come on Robb, whatever is going on in my life, I'll always be here for Christmas."

She tried to reply confidently, but his soft, not very amused chuckle made her dread what was coming. The safety of Jon's arms was worth more than thirst..and _this._ Why in the hell did she leave it?

"Ah Sansa." Robb sighed. "I'm happy to see you, I'm sure our parents will be overjoyed to see you, and overlook everything the past few m-"

"Robb, it's late." She boldly interrupted.

As she began her escape, Robb stood from his chair and moved around the counter. Coming to stand in front of her, she noticed the hurt in his eyes and stood frozen in guilt. 

"I think you're right. It is late. Too late." Robb spoke under his breath. 

"Its not." She insisted. "I..I'm not here to cause anymore drama."

"You brought that in the second you walked through the door. You came back to our home after months of no word and-"

Sansa began to step around him already knowing what he'd say, with no interest in hearing it, when she felt turned around by her arm.

"Robb-"

"I know-we all know Sansa. It's not a secret, and while it's none of my business, I want you to consider my advice anyway." He pulled her closer as she held her breath. "You are with him, or you are with Jon. You can not have them both. Make your decision and stick to it, because you-"

"I'm not talking about it right now Robb." She snapped while wriggling free.

Hearing him growl, Sansa spun around in anger and contemplated leaving. Her keys were on the hutch just a few feet away. She could grab them and leave. In her robe. In the middle of the night.

"Go ahead. I won't mention you were here, and I'll just explain to Jon that you.."

Robb's words died in his throat and she felt the sting of tears. She missed her brother. Missed her family. She missed Robb. She missed..

"Robb." She choked.

Sobbing the moment he embraced her, Sansa held onto her brother and let it all come out. Every tear she hadn't cried, every feeling she held inside, every truth she'd kept to herself, as Robb listened. Gracious, patient and without interrupting, he was the friend she needed at that exact moment in her life. 

 

**_One month earlier..._ **

 

"Oh yes...yes, yes, yesssss, ahhh it feels so ah-mmmmm." Sansa moaned.

Jaime parted her lips as she hummed into his mouth. As their tongues danced together, she held tightly around his shoulders as his fingers glided under her silk panties. His present to her was soaked less than half an hour of trying them on for him and now he was deliberately keeping her on the edge of cumming. 

"Jaime please." She begged.

Jaime groaned in response and pushed two fingers deep inside her cunt. Her back arched off the bed as she panted heavily. He lost his mind when she begged and it got her what she wanted, every time. Writhing against his slow circling thumb on her clit, Sansa licked her lips on the cusp of peaking. 

"Yes, oh god yes Daddy." 

"Fucking hell Sansa." He growled. 

Jaime withdrew his fingers as Sansa bit her lip, anticipating quite the grand finale, and oh how she needed it. His touch was perfect and she came to crave it. It got dirtier, rougher, more animalistic than she'd ever imagined, and her body needed him. 

"Anhhh!!" She screamed out as he entered her.

She heard Jaime growl, his fingertips dug into her shoulders as their bodies synced and she felt like sobbing. So wet, he had easily slid deep inside her, Sansa's strained moan came out almost silent. She bit down and heard him grunting about how wet she was, some curse words and the heat of his breath on her neck before he began to move. And move he did, in the most subtle way at first. A slight roll of his hips, coming out enough to swipe down her clit before pushing back in.

"Oh fuck Jaime.. _move."_

She sounded like a whining child, a beggar, and in the moment she could care less, wanting only to climax around his cock. She wanted it to last, but wanted it now. 

_I want a lot._

Jaime seemed to know exactly what she wanted and responded immediately. By immediately, he meant to torture her. The more she writhed, encouraged movement with her feet flat over his calves, lifting her hips higher, then wrapping her legs around his ass to navigate, the more he resisted. His breath came out slow and steady as hers quickened, she could almost feel him grinning. 

"You son of a bitch." She hissed.

Jaime chuckled and hummed as he thrust back into her. 

"Too eager my love." 

She was on the edge of losing her mind when she felt him nip on her earlobe. Biting her bottom lip hard, she refused to give him the satisfaction. 

_Fine. I can play this game._

Another soft chuckle came from his breath and she dug her nails into his back.

"Saaaaansaaa." He warned. 

"I'm not afraid to draw blood." She replied.

That got the response she intended. The sound of bodies slapping together echoed through his room. Sansa squealed in ecstasy as Jaime pounded into her. She felt her hair being pulled from the back and lifted her hips as the blood raced hot through her body. The nerves began pooling and tightening at her core, she felt herself getting more and more wet with each thrust. Her moans turned obscene when the base of his cock slicked up and down her clit, bringing her closer and closer....

_And closer..close...close.._

_"I'm cumming."_ She choked.

"That's my girl, cum for daddy."

"Oh fuck." Sansa cried.

A flash of white a second later and her body seized, clenching around him in spasms as a last powerful thrust signaled his own release. A warmth spread through her body as he filled her, her breath coming out shakily as he held onto her tightly, his own orgasm shuddering over her. Connected to every inch of him, she could feel his need for her and was about to sigh when a slam came from his open door.

 

"She's gone." 

Sansa just sat there. In one of his t-shirts. In his kitchen. 

Dumbfounded.

_What the hell just happened?_

She had brothers. This was.. _unusual._

 _"_ Sansa-"

"What..was that?" She nearly whispered.

Jaime swallowed and seemed to compose himself before replying.

"Before you give me some bullshit explanation Jaime-" She stopped to breathe deeply. "I don't..just don't lie to me. I saw the two of you arguing. I saw her reaction. I can understand that US is a hard pill to swallow..but that.." Stopping to take another breath, she continued. "That seemed like.."

"It's..complicated." 

"For Christ sake Jaime, what isn't?" She felt tired already. "Just give it to me straight."

He sighed heavily, rested his hand on the counter as though he needed to brace himself, and hung his head low. Then, Sansa noticed it. 

His age. It showed. In that very moment, she watched Jaime age ten years before her eyes. The sudden urge to ease his pain so he wouldn't have to say it..

"How long Jaime?"

His poor soul.

Pain. 

Conflict.

Loyalty.

Love.

She saw it all. Every wrinkle in his frown, every sporadic gray through his hair and the scruff on his face, the faded shimmer in those gleaming eyes, made it so perfectly clear.

"We were just children." 

It came from his lips in the saddest, softest tone. She could feel the pain from it. Knowing something in your head is torturous enough. Saying it aloud to _anyone.._ that, made it more real than yourself. Sansa knew, this was the first time he'd ever said it aloud. Her face softened. Her shoulders relaxed as she fought the urge to run and embrace him. 

When he finally managed to raise his head and looked at her, it was through eyes filled with tears. Tears of frustration, and damn..she could understand.

"I have never loved anyone." He managed. "I haven't known anything else Sansa."

She had to swallow hard herself, and gripped the edge of the counter to keep the tears back.

"I don't..I don't-" His hand ran through his hair as he balled his hand into a fist. "I don't know what I can say to make sense of this. It's horrible, and I know it's horrible, and I honestly never thought of it as horrible or even gave a shit what anyone thought until.." 

His voice quivered, making it hard to hold the tears back. Sansa felt them roll down her cheeks as she moved to get up from her chair.

"Don't." He demanded, holding his hand up as he looked down. "You should go Sansa, this..this is over."

Her mouth hung open, unwilling to believe he was simply done. What she'd forgive. What she would be willing to accept. A truth that meant more than the sin. A chance he was clearly throwing away. 

Her words were all caught in her throat. Deeper in fact. Backed up all the way down to her heart, that felt like it was being squeezed. Her lungs felt as though there was no room to breathe. 

"Go!" He shouted. 

"You fool." She choked. 

 

 

Waking up up in her own bed, Sansa looked up to see Robb sitting by her side. 

"Merry Christmas dummy."

"Merry Christmas." She mumbled. 

She heard the faint voices of her family downstairs and as she sat up slowly, looking at Robb with concern. He reached out gently to touch her cheek.

"Listen." He waited as they listened together. She heard Bran laugh with her Dad. Robb smirked and met her eyes. Taking a deep breath he stroked her cheek. "That, that's what you're here for..right?"

Sansa nodded, feeling the lump in her throat.

"Because Sansa, we are a family, and this one just happens to be hell-bent on sticking together. So whatever happened, whatever is going on, and all the drama happening in ALL of our lives, hey..we are a family, a pretty damn great one, and God damnit, we'll get through it.. _together."_

She just nodded as the tears began to roll. Robb kindly wiped them away with his thumbs and kissed her forehead. 

"It's going to be okay Sansa." 

She happily eased into his embrace and nodded silently. Robb pulled back gripping her shoulders with both hands and shook her once. 

"We're Starks San."

_Yes. We are._

_"_ Do you have a moment Sansa?" 

She stared at Jon with the gift in her lap. His eyes dark and wide, discarding everything around them. Her eyes scanned the room and was met with no means of escape. Somehow, after Jon had handed her his gift last, the family had gathered in the kitchen now and there was nowhere to hide. No excuse to be made. Keeping her mouth from hanging open like an idiot, she folded her hands over the thoughtful gift in her lap and sighed, defeated.

Nodding slowly, he rose and extended his hand. As she took it, he led her to the back door and stood still. Standing there, her hand in his, she watched him stare out as though it were miles. She couldn't take her eyes off of him. He was so exquisite, so beautiful, such a perfect fool. 

"I've missed you." She blurted.

The smallest hint of a smile played at the corner of his lips and she felt a twinge of relief. 

"I love you Sansa." He said, continuing to stare straight ahead. "I..I love you, and I don't think I will ever love anyone like that."

God she missed him. Her heart cracked in two at the thought of losing him. What had happened that the love for this man could not resolve? How she believed him. How she saw how much he loved her. Was there anything more than that? Why hadn't it been enough? Why had doubt destroyed the most beautiful thing she had ever known? 

He finally turned to look at her, and that look.

_That look._

She was not prepared for it. 

"Run away with me?" 

Oh, could it please be that simple.

She felt as though she'd run away before. 

Could she stop being afraid.

_Afraid? Of WHAT?_

"Sansa?" Her father's voice came from behind them. 

As she turned, she saw him holding her stocking. 

"Jon..did you?" Ned asked as he turned it upside down. The box fumbked in his hand as he stared at Jon. "Is this you?"

She looked at him, her eyes wide and breath caught in her throat. His jaw clenched and a dread filled her empty stomach as her father opened the small box. 

She knew what it was. Knew who it was from, and knew this was the wrong fucking moment for it. 

"No." Jon replied flatly, snatching his hand away from hers. "It's not me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly feel like crap for how long it's been since I've updated anything. There is no excuse when you have a passion, and believe me..THIS is a passion. But IRL, my passion is..well, it's cooking. And when you're a chef at a french restaurant in New Orleans, that's pretty much your life..that, and family. I'm here. I swear, I'm here. 
> 
> Thank you to EVERYONE who's still with me and please believe, I am so appreciative.


End file.
